So far today, Alexis has:

- Emptied her closet of every single article of clothing and spread said articles of clothing all over our upstairs. She can now perform an emergency wardrobe change just about anywhere.

- Dumped a bottle of Dora bubble bath all over the bathroom floor. (Note to makers of Dora bubble bath: Snap top lids are good. Screw off lids are bad. Very bad. I'm not buying any more Dora bubble bath until you switch. Ask Starbucks just how good I am at keeping my boycotting promises.)

- Carried precisely 22 bottles of water from the ledge in the kitchen to the dining room table. Since I was thirsty, I only made her carry 21 of them back.

- Colored part of the living room floor a lovely shade of orange. She then pretended to be Mr. Clean and scrubbed the orange floor until it looked like maple wood again.

- Relocated every item in the bathroom drawer to her crib. Just in case she needs some feminine hygiene products later tonight, I guess.

- Climbed on top of the dining room table and tried to swing from the chandelier. I'm so very sorry to report that she wasn't tall enough to get a good grip. But she did give it her best shot.

- Dumped an entire bag of fish food all over the kitchen floor, picked it up, and dumped it out again, all the while singing, "If fishy hungry! The fishy hungry!" to the tune of If You're Happy and You Know It.

- Poured the dog food out of the dog food bowls and onto the kitchen floor then filled the bowls with the fish food. By the time she was done, the dog food was cleaned up and in the fish food bag. No harm done, I'm sure Meg will be just as willing to eat fish food as she is everything else that fits in her mouth.

And THAT my friends, takes us up to lunchtime. I would tell you about our adventure at the craft store, but I think I need a nap.