We conducted a very valuable scientific experiment last night, and I think it's prudent that I share the results with you. If you deprive your weird child of green beans for a few weeks, she will be so happy to see them at Boston Market that she will start shoveling them into her mouth before you are able to so much as sit down. She will not pause to chew because that would get in the way of the green bean shoveling. She will be able to comfortably fit 17 green beans in her Toddler mouth, but IF she attempts to go for 18, then it's all over. Her gag reflux will be triggered and you will get to show everyone just how great a job she did of chewing that Strawberry Shredded Wheat earlier in the day, and how craptacular of a job she was doing of chewing those green beans. An important aside, she will resume shoveling food just as soon as she is cleaned up, so make sure to cut the green beans into teeny tiny pieces before wiping all the vomit off yourself. Otherwise, you will be inviting an opportunity to once again verify that 17 is the maximum capacity of a Toddler mouth.

Don't you feel smarter now?