Before I tell you who won the Caption Contest, how about the story about how the photo came to be? It's a short little story, so I'm sure everybody will survive the wait.

I have been on a mission ALL summer to get a photo of the Toddler laying around in the grass. I happen to think grass makes a most excellent background and the Toddler happens to think that's very nice and no thank you. She.will.not.cooperate. But, there we were, trying again. This time, I had a weapon of mass cooperation with me--a gummy worm. I offered the kid a gummy worm (which is like offering me a lifetime supply of chocolate and fruit pizza) if she would sit on the grass on her elbows. She obliged. I handed her the gummy worm and moved into position to take a few thousand photos. As is ALWAYS the case, the second the camera came out the kid forgot how to make eye contact and would do nothing but stare at her book and maw on her gummy worm. I snapped away anyway figuring that I would just delete pretty much every picture I took.

Then it happened.

She dropped the gummy worm in the grass.

In the part of the yard where the dogs go to the bathroom.

Time stopped, the Earth quit rotating, and birds everywhere turned to watch as I yelled, "Nooooooo, doooooon't piiiiick it uuuuuuup," and tried to scramble over.

Too late.

The Toddler picked up the gummy worm and promptly stuck it back in her mouth. I'm guessing by the face she made (caught forever in that photo) that it didn't taste too fabulous. Mmmmmm . . . pee-flavored gummy worms.

Immediately after? She did what she ALWAYS does when she ends up with food she doesn't like. She went hunting for Meg, knowing full well that if anybody will eat whatever gross thing the Toddler has, it's the Bulldog.

So . . . the contest winner.

Bum, bum, bum.

La, la, la, la, la, la.

Oh, were you waiting for something?

Well then, it was CLOSE. Like, REAL CLOSE. By one YES ONE vote, Flea has triumphed. Sorry about your luck, Colleen. Maybe next time. (I would feel worse about this close call, but I actually met Colleen this past Saturday Live! and! In! Person! and she got to eat some of my homemade macaroni -n- cheese and some fruit salad I concocted. I think that makes her a winner right there.)

Flea, email me (burghbaby(at)gmail(dot)com) and let me know if you prefer Starbucks or McDonalds and give me your address.

And . . . because she so PERFECTLY managed to ascertain what was going on the day that photo was taken, I hereby declare Kimmjo a winner, too! Email me and we'll set things in motion.