Update from the Fishtank of Horrors: The last time we checked in on the little fishies, there had been a bit of a domestic altercation of the Clown fish kind. It seemed that Belly had quite enough of The B*tch's crap and had done a little fighting back. Well, a few days later, Belly went REAL crazy. Instead of calling the fishy police and filing a victim statement, he/she went all vigilante and MURDERED The B*tch. Yup, the B*tch went from being Queen of the tank to be Queen of the throne very suddenly. I'm pretty sure the jury will see that Belly was acting out of self defense, but the trial isn't scheduled for a few months.

Further Proof that I am a Dork: If you happen to one day be cutting raisin bread for your two-year old and she is a wee bit impatient with the process and the shrill yelling freaks you out so much that you nearly chop off a finger, think very hard before slapping a the pretty pink Hello Kitty Band-aid over the bloody gash. You may think that there is no way anyone will notice your princessy moment, but if you have a softball game? EVERYONE will notice the pretty pink kitties and will give you crap about it. That is, of course, entirely a hypothetical situation. It has never happened to me. I only wear manly Band-aids.

About Softball: The Just for the Heck of it softball season has come to a close, and my team found ourselves with a perfect record. Of losing. However, there wasn't a single moment in which it mattered that we couldn't win (or even come close), because we had more fun than any other softball team in the history of softball. No, really. We did.

(Huge thank you goes out to Mr. Husband for being totally cool with being a single parent for a few hours on game days. You rock, sir.)

Falls Under the Category of Completely Unnecessary: The Toddler. Oye, her mouth. She has two new habits that have me looking for a nice rickety bridge to stand on while semis drive by at 100 mph. The less bad of the two is her new variation on, "no." She now says, "nuh-uh." I LOATHE it. I want to scream just hearing the first syllable. One thing no toddler needs is to be able to express "no" in multiple forms. Hate. It.

The other thing she's been doing has me thoroughly screwed. She is beginning her I Want sentences with, "I have an idea!" How the hell do you say no to, "I have an idea! Let's watch Dora!" It's like she's doing me this giant favor by doing the thinking for me and coming up with some sort of genius idea. Hate. it.

Rain Rain Go Over Here, Please: Wal-Hell has been running killer clearance sales on summery toys lately, including a line that has picnic baskets, gardening tools, and rain gear in it. So, we picked up a few items for next year. However, when Alexis decided that she didn't care if it was only 75 degrees out, she was swimming, I put on my Genius Cap and yanked out that rain gear for a little splish-splash fun. It was indeed fun, but now I just want it to pour one day so we can truly get our umbrella on.