When Jen agreed to meet on Sunday to let our kids play together for a little while, I don't think she was expecting that she would need a protection order for her little boy, Dylan. She does. STAT.

Miss Alexis started out slow. A sideways glance here and there, a few location checks, but she kept coming back to me. Then we decided to relocate from the play area in the mall to the food court. This happened:

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. Cute. Also, totally a "starter" move. Once we sat down to eat, Alexis moved in for the kill.

And again.

And again. And again. And again. And AGAIN. Seriously, I have fifty photos of my kid putting Dylan in a choke hold and then making out with the side of his face. And him enjoying it.

The good news is that I *think* Alexis was more "playing mommy" than she was hitting on the poor little guy. She was all about fussing at him that he couldn't run off while his mom was ordering food, and downright herded him back to us adults any time he tried to stray. At one point she even lectured him about "safe."

Don't try to argue with that little story I've built in my head. I either need to go with that, or look into investing in some crazy security system so I can lock Alexis is the basement for the next 20 years.

OK, 30 years.