If you have a nest egg in savings, you might want to go on a little shopping spree. If you have a couple of things left to do on your Bucket List, you better get busy. If you have anybody you need to apologize to, you better pick up the phone. I have seen signs of the apocalypse, and we're all short on time.

In the past two days, I have cleaned out every closet in our house, some of which hadn't been opened in years because the massive piles of crap inside were lodged so tightly they were bound to come shooting out the second the door opened. I might have lost an eye doing it, but woooohooo for clean closets!

You should be afraid.

Yesterday, I took down the Christmas tree in Alexis' room. She walked in and discovered my sin about halfway through. She demonstrated that although she doesn't know what it means, she totally knows how to make a WTF Face. It took some major fast-talking for me to get out of that room alive. And with a fully boxed up Christmas tree.

You should be afraid.

When we first bought this house, very high on the List of Things We Hated were the interior doors. They were a fugly dark brown faux-wood sticker over cardboard sort of contraption. We ran out and bought a bunch of new doors over the years, but somehow, the upstairs ones never quite got installed. The pretty new doors sat down in our garage gathering dust for years. YEARS. This weekend, Mr. Husband installed them all.

You should be afraid.

The world is ending. Either that, or we put in an offer on a house today and expect to put our itty bitty townhouse up for sale right after Memorial Day.

COMMENCE FREAKOUT!