1. Mystery wet spots--Get your head out of the gutter, I'm not talking about THAT kind of wet spot. I'm talking about the kind that I sometimes step in during the middle of the night while walking down the hall. Every time it happens, I'm frozen in fear. Was it one of Cody The I Refuse to be Fully Housebroken Pup's fabulous pee spots? Did the cat puke up five gallons of dog food? Is it poop? If so, who was the pooper? Is Nashea Davenport hiding in the closet? The fear of not knowing if it is in fact some sort of bodily discharge that has squished up around the bottom of my nekkid little feebie is the stuff of nightmares. *shudders*

2. Creepy dolls--Oh, I've shut up about them, but that doesn't mean the things aren't still frightening enough to make me want to sit in the corner, curled up in the fetal position and whimpering. Who could ever forget this face? *whimpers*

3. Bulldog farts--It starts with the unmistakable sound of a wet stream of air puffing out of the Bulldog's ass. When I hear it, I freeze in place, afraid to so much as blink for fear that any movement whatsoever will cause the air to shift and will force the odor to waft my way. *cries*

4. Zac Efron's eyebrows--Have you ever really looked at those things? They totally give me the heebie jeebies. They look like two giant, well-pruned, hairy caterpillars. Every time I see him (and that's a lot since we live and breath High School Musical these days), I cringe, just waiting for those caterpillars to spring to life and attack me. *winces*

5. Herds of small children--I am petrified of picking Alexis up from daycare early because I know that the second I walk in that door, 20 short people will surround me. They bring with them screaming, interrogations, snot, and enough energy to power New York City for years. If they were to get organized, I'm positive that a large group of 3-year old kids could take over the universe. Just imagine the things they would make us grown-ups do. Like watch hours and hours of High School Musical. *runs away screaming*

PS--Never, ever do anything JanePitt tells you to do, or you'll need to expand your list to six things that are scarier than swine flu.