Meme Meme Mene Meme

I was tagged a little while back for 7 (more) random things about me. This time Veronica was the one spreading the meme love. While I really should be doing things that would in some way contribute to us leaving early in the morning, this seems like more fun. So here goes:

1. I don't remember the name of Alexis' Cabbage Patch doll, but mine were named Karla Robyn and Anson Nolan. Karla had light brown curly yarn hair and green eyes and Anson was a bald little preemie with blue eyes. Isn't it great that I can remember those completely useless tidbits, but can't remember if I have already washed my hair after just two minutes in the shower?

2. You can drop me in any major city in the United States and I will find a Target store. I realized that I had this skill back when I travelled a lot for work. I needed to pick up candy for my training classes since it tends to get ruined when shipped. I never once failed to provide the chocolate love.

3. Alexis is already working on acquiring her own Target location system. She's not looking for candy, however. She wants her popcorn. She starts chanting "popcorn" the second she sees the red stripe on the side of the building. The bulls eye sends her completely over the edge. I accept full responsibility for creating that monster. A bag of popcorn is all it takes for me to get to shop in peace for at least 20 minutes. That's totally worth the $1.07 if you ask me.

4. I was a foreign exchange student in Spain during high school. While I was there, I completely blew off classes. Who wouldn't while living less than a mile from the Mediterranean? The one and only class I did really well in was Math. Apparently Calculus is the International language. English is not. I got the equivalent of a B because the instructor and I evidently don't speak the same version of English. Anytime I answered a question differently than he would, he said I was incorrect. He was completely unwilling to entertain the thought that perhaps I spoke American English while he was speaking British English and that neither one of us was wrong.

5. I long ago began referring to Alexis as Michigan J. Frog because of the fact that she will stop whatever she's doing if she realizes she has an audience. It turns out that is a more than accurate moniker for her. The girl LOVES to sing, especially in the car. But if anyone so much as glances her way, she stops. It's making it very difficult to capture her singing on video. But I will because you have never seen anything as cute as a one-year old singing.

6. Meg (the Bulldog), Jasmine (the Lhasa Apso), and Powder (the white cat) are all named for Disney characters. Ten points goes to the first person that can name all three of the movies referenced.

7. I was a professional musician in high school. Seriously. I was paid $70 per show to perform in the pit orchestra at the summer theatre in Minot, North Dakota. I played clarinet, oboe, and saxophone. My favorite show was Guys and Dolls, mostly because I got to play my Soprano clarinet. Said Soprano clarinet is in our basement and I can still play it, but I doubt anyone would pay to hear me these days.

I would tag seven people to do this next, but I can't think of that many people that haven't done it lately. So I'll just tag Jayna at My Longest Year and Kidzmama at Not a Spare Minute.

It's Been at Least a Week Since I Bored You with Random Stuff

-- I don't remember what her name is, but I've been seeing a whole lot of Cabbage Patch girl's butt lately. Alexis figured out that she came with a diaper beneath all of her clothing and has been spending her every spare moment changing that poor doll. I say "poor doll" because apparently she's got more problems than just the tattoo of her ex-boyfriend's name on her rear (Or was Xavier Roberts their Dad? Either way, CREEPY!). All Alexis says while changing her is "baby pooped" or "poop" or "pooping." She must have eaten some really bad Mexican.

-- The world can stop calling me with interview requests and job offers now. It's all good. At last count I already had one job too many. But thanks.

-- I suffered through the torture that is a haircut and highlights earlier today. "Torture" because the little girl that did it was really chatty and I wasn't in the mood for small talk after a challenging day of trying to pretend to be interested in anything that my current boss was saying (How do you not yawn when talking about boats? I mean, really. Boats. If you have any idea, let me know. I could use some help here). BTW, is it just me, or do hairdressers stay the same age forever? I mean, I know I'm getting older (and I'm totally OK with it). But it seems to me that despite the fact that I'm getting older, hairdressers never do. Is there some sort of forced retirement for them at the age of 30? Are their cosmetology licenses revoked if they are old enough to who was President before the current President?

-- We start a mini vacation in about 20 hours. Not that we are counting or anything. And for those of you that have been wondering, yes, we will be spending that mini vacation in Indianapolis. Get ready Grandparents, here comes your girl. Just don't forget, she's a package deal. If you want Alexis, you have to take this one too.

Now She's Just Screwing with Me

Let's pretend for a moment that you are all 21 months old. If Friday night you weren't feeling your best and kept your Mom up most of the night, how would you follow that up? Remember, your mission is to make her as insane as possible. What's that? You'd sleep through the night? That's a good start. But there's something that you could do to make her even crazier. Sleep late. But not just a little late, sleep in until after 9:00. I know, I know, you've never done such a thing in your entire life. Trust me, if you do it now, your Mom will go completely wacko. You've trained her to wake up by 6:30 every day. So she'll wake up, think you're going to wake up any second, and then will lay awake waiting for you. When you don't make a peep, she'll start walking over to your door every once in a while to check on you. If you're still asleep after about 8:00, then she'll convince herself that something must be really wrong and she'll start poking you just to make sure you're alive. Keep sleeping through it, that's the best way to get her into a straight jacket before your second birthday.

Oh, and while you're at it, pretend that riding around in your doll's stroller is the funnest thing you've ever done. Just the doll stroller though, don't ever be caught enjoying your own stroller. That would just be wrong.