It's amazing how kids manage to find just the right words to leave you feeling like they stormed into a once hidden room, ripped open the closet door, and started tossing your skeletons all over the place. A femur! A tibia! A skull! Those skeletons go flying left and right as you stand there trying to figure out just the right way to make it all stop.
Kids mean no harm. They just don't understand the concepts of "emotional baggage" and "questions best left un-asked."
I have no secrets. Absolutely none. If Alexis asks a question, I do what I can to answer it. However, there are some stories that aren't really mine to tell. There are times when the explanation needs to come from someone else. I don't like to speak for people when it's their skeletons and their emotional baggage hanging out on the clothesline.
Alexis' definition of "emotional baggage" probably involves throwing a favorite toy into a backpack and dragging it around all day, occasionally peeking in that backpack and smiling as a rush of happy overcomes her. She can't possibly understand the cut of her some of her interrogations.
There's no rush of happy when she starts digging through the emotional baggage. Why are her grandparents no longer married to each other? ASK THEM, KID. It's not my story. Where is my dad? FIGURE IT OUT, KID. I'm not going to tell her how she should judge him. Do I have any brothers and sisters? JUST GRAB A KNIFE, KID. Poke around until blood is drawn and I'll still be left thinking there are other people who are in a much better position to explain all of the complications and history. My mom? NOT FAIR, KID. She's not here to explain why she spent so much of her time hidden in the closet dancing with her own skeletons. Do I really have to try to answer for her when it is all so very twisted and angst-ridden?
I like things simple. I like the skeletons neatly hanging and the closet door closed. I like looking at that toy that fills me with happiness.
Alexis just doesn't understand what she's asking when she starts digging at those skeletons. I'm left to take a deep breath and charge ahead with some sort of answer.
