There is a teensy part of my brain that realizes that it's not a burrito causing all that stomach bloat. An even teensier part of my brain has figured out that only fifteen weeks remain between now and when that burrito turns out to be a screaming bundle of sleep deprivation.
So, like one brain cell gets it. One brain cell gets that this Tiny Human thing might actually happen.
That one brain cell started to get a little panicky about the fact that ABSOLUTELY NOTHING IS DONE this weekend. That one brain cell decided maybe it's time to at least start considering the possibility of doing the minimum to prepare. So, that one brain cell loaded Alexis into the car and drove to Babies R Us.
First of all, HOLY CRAP. It has been years and years since I last set foot inside that store. It's ... overwhelming. There is just so much stuff. Most of it I know it stupid and useless, which is fun because while Alexis and I walked around, she kept asking, "Why would anyone need THAT?"
On her list of pointless things: wipes warmers, snack packs that attach to a stroller, mosquito netting for strollers, sleep sacks, head supports for car seats, and pretty much everything in the feeding aisle. I'm not saying she's right, but she's not entirely wrong, now is she?
We weren't there to actually buy anything, but more to jar my memory on what is actually needed and useful so that I can sort through what we have and find the gaps. If there is one good thing about marrying a hoarder, it's that we really do have most everything from when Alexis was a fresh little burrito. Once I sort through it all, there won't be much that's truly needed.
I needed to jar my memory, though. I have long ago forgotten about all of that stuff.
So Alexis and I walked up and down each and every aisle, her asking questions and pointing out the useless stuff, and me making mental notes of what to check and see if we still have. We went around and around the store, until we reached a point where Alexis stood transfixed, completely unable to move.
She was staring at one of these things. A mamaRoo from 4moms.
First she asked what the purpose of the contraption was, which was easy to answer. I told her it was basically a bouncy seat like the blue one she has. That "has" is the proper tense because while that particular burrito had ZERO interest in being in a bouncer seat when she was tiny, she continues to use hers for her dolls. Baby Shell especially is a big fan of being strapped in and going for a little bounce.
Alexis asked a few more questions about the contraption, most of which involved trying to understand WHY anyone would need something so fancy for an infant. She's practical, is what I'm saying.
Finally, she stopped staring at the mamaRoo and walked over to where I was standing. "Mom," she said, "We didn't have that kind of fancy stuff back in my day," she continued.
I told you she's got the soul of a grandma.