OK, ladies. Stop everything. Empty your purse. What's in there?
I have my phone, wallet, keys, a pile of receipts and coupons, a few pennies, and lip balm.
That's it.
You know what's not in there?
Diapers, wipes, snacks, extra clothing, and basically everything else you're supposed to carry around when you have a baby. Which, I suppose, wouldn't be a problem if I would carry a diaper bag but NOPE. All the nopes.
I'm not entirely sure why it's so hard for me to walk around prepared, but there it is. I'm not. I have two really nice diaper bags. I legit tried to make it a thing to use them, but it lasted like two days. There's something about being SO VERY DONE with that phase with Alexis that broke me of the ability to be undone. It's like the first time I had to pay for diapers after six years of not buying them. Real actual pain, y'all.
So I basically run all around town with a tiny person and no tiny person gear. It's a fun game of chicken. Will we make it to the grocery store and back without an emergency diaper change? Can Mila survive an entire Pirates game wearing the same clothes? You just never know!
The whole thing makes Grandma Alexis NUTS. She happily carries around everything plus the kitchen sink in her 235234 purses. She doesn't get why I don't like carrying stuff. She respects the "different people, different ways of doing things" thing, though, so mostly she just yells "I TOLD YOU SO" when I lose the game of chicken.
You know what's fun? When you're driving down the road, the baby suddenly decides she's hungry, and your big kid keeps yelling "I TOLD YOU SO." It's amazing how many miles can go by without seeing any way of fixing the situation. So much screaming and yelling and WHY DO I NOT CARRY SNACKS? Oh, right. Because I refuse.
It was during one of those crazy loud circus acts that I decided I might want to give in on the whole thing. It wasn't the noise that made me cave, though. It was the fact that Alexis fixed the screaming by giving Mila a cracker that she found between the seats in the back of the car. I, uh, don't remember the last time I purchased said crackers. I think maybe it had been there for a year? Longer? I mean, Mila ate it and was seemingly fine, but I kind of felt bad that she was eating a cracker that was older than her.
So! Plan! I decided that I would start carrying snacks! Except that I really couldn't do that because nope. So! Different plan! I decided that I would keep snacks in the car! Except that Alexis kept stealing the snacks for herself. So! Best plan! HIDE SNACKS IN THE CAR.
Shhhhhh! Don't tell anyone, but there is currently a Kellogg's Frosted Mini Wheats Cereal In A Cup in the console between my front seats. There's also a little cup of Froot Loops in the glovebox and a cup of Frosted Flakes in the trunk because of course there is. If Alexis figures out one of my hiding places, I will have backup! So far this little scheme is working quite perfectly. Cereal magically appears when needed.
It's quick, easy, portable, doesn't end up crushed thanks to the container, and ranks high on the nutrition scale. As an added bonus, Grandma Alexis hasn't had to yell "I TOLD YOU SO" in weeks.
Dear Kellogg's, Thank you for making Cereal In A Cup. You're super smart and stuff. Love, The Lady Who Will Make the Best of Summer Without a Diaper Bag
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