If you had asked 14-year old me what she thought 34-year old me would be doing, she probably would have snapped her gum, twirled her over-permed hair, and muttered something about ruling the universe, or at the very least some sort of big company. Through a thick North Dakota accent, she would have laid out plans involving wealth and world travel and the single life.
Sometimes 34-year old me thinks about those plans and wonders what the hell happened. Not that I have any regrets, because I most certainly don't, it's just that I would have thought that at this point in life I would be further along my career path, debt-free, and I most certainly thought I would have figured out a cure for split ends by now. Heck, I would have thought that I would have negotiated world peace, put an end to poverty, and prevented Carrot Top from becoming the world's scariest thing with a face. I kinda aimed high, if you know what I mean.
And I still do.
Somewhere along the path of life, I figured out that I'm here to make a difference, but not in the way I originally pictured. Rather that doing it all by myself, I feel like I'm here to make sure Alexis gets a chance to do whatever it is that she decides she wants to do.
I've always thought that the kid will grow up to do something truly amazing. I still think that. My job is to stay out of her way as she finds her way there. It's like I'm the bumper pads at the bowling alley, not really interfering with the ball, but making sure it keeps headed in the general direction of that strike.
This kid. She's going to do some amazing things.
When I think about 14-year old me, I realize just how far I've come and how much I've accomplished. I mean, I grew up in a house that looked like this:
(Not our actual house, but close enough in appearance to make me look twice.)
And now I live in this:
And I can safely say I moved on up all by myself, through a lot of hard work and stubbornness and a bunch more hard work.
Now I have the privilege of seeing just how far Alexis can go.
It's going to be amazing.