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Eight appears to be the age of Questions and Observations.

"Mom, I was more comfortable in first grade than I was in second grade," Alexis said to me in the car one day.

"Why do you think that is?" I asked.

She thought for a few moments and then replied, "I was more confident, I think."

Confidence and comfort really do go hand-in-hand, don't they? We talked about the relationship between the two things for a few minutes. I discovered you can learn a lot from listening to an 8-year old.

Another day later in the same week, we were running through the grocery store. Alexis noticed that I had placed something unfamiliar to her in the cart.

"Mom, what is that for?" she asked.

I hesitated. She was referring to a package of pads (yay for post-baby fun). Before that moment, she had never asked about anything related to periods, so I hadn't filled her in. I wanted to do so in an age appropriate way and I really wanted to emphasize that it's no big deal. The kid is a worrier, but there's no sense in worrying about something years in advance and, again, it's no big deal.

I gave her a brief answer. Her face filled with worry. "Mom, that sounds uncomfortable," she replied. I addressed her concern as best I could, but then remembered our conversation about first grade vs. second grade. It was time to let her address her own concern.

"Hey, remember when you said you feel more comfortable when you are confident?" I said. She quickly replied that she did. "What makes you feel comfortable and confident?" I asked.

Alexis' list was a good one.

1. Wearing clothes that are cute like her black capri leggings (aka her Milli Vanilli pants) and a t-shirt.

2. Being around friends that are nice.

3. Doing something fun like going to an amusement park and riding roller coasters.

4. Listening to good music.

5. Doing something that she knows that she can do because she has done it before, like cartwheels and back walkovers.

6. Helping other people by doing things like tying a little kid's shoe or picking up something that somebody dropped in a store.

7. Doing things alone like reading a book or hanging out in her bedroom.

8. Having a fun day in Pittsburgh.

When she was done with her list, I realized how similar it is to my own. Many of the things involved moving, which is really my main way of being comfortable. If I'm in motion, I'm generally happy. If I'm sitting around like a bump on a log, I start to feel the ick setting in. I also noticed that some of the things she listed were things I would recommend that she do when having a period makes her feel uncomfortable. They work for me, so why not for her as well?

I circled the conversation back around and we talked about how all of the things that were on her list were things you can do while you have your period. Alexis seemed dubious, but then I asked her if she knows when I have my period.

She didn't.

It's really not a big deal.

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