I realize that this video has been EVERYWHERE today and that the horse is bloody and beaten, but I have a vision in my mind of Alexis discovering it in ten or twenty years and asking me about it.
"Mom," she'll say. "Why was this a big deal?"
"That's a very long story," will be my reply.
And I'll be glad for the conversation that will follow because it will give me a chance to point out that intolerance (I hate that word, but it's the best one I can come up with at the moment) can be stamped out. Alexis and I will talk about how mankind has historically declared things that were different to be wrong, and how it's important for her to learn from our mistakes. Different isn't wrong. It's different.
We need to accept one another. We need to practice kindness. And we certainly can't attack people who see the world differently than we do.
In the hours following the release of President Obama's statement, I watched as opinions on Twitter evolved. Pride and relief gave way to doubt and suspicion. Accusations that Obama was "flip-flopping" started to fly, comments about how it was "too little too late" were made . . . and then those who disagree with President Obama gained the courage to start attacking.
And then those who agree with President Obama attacked back.
Nothing is accomplished by saying the person who disagrees with you is a horrible human being or a sinner or stupid. Attacking and name-calling isn't intelligent discussion. It only forces people to dig in their heels as they refuse to hear your argument. I've been guilty of it in the past, but I realize now that if I want someone to really hear me, I have to stop being a jerk as I present the facts.
The facts, as I see them, are as simple as this: love is love. If two people want to celebrate their love by making a lifelong commitment, it should be their decision to make. My life will change in no way when same-sex marriage becomes a norm. There may be benefits that come about, but there most certainly will be no harm.
My marriage will mean just as much then as it does now.
If you disagree with me, I'll ask you to substantiate your opinion. If you quote a book in your reasoning, I'll ask if you've really read that book. Perhaps you should to read it again? Because, you know, you can't pick and choose which lines to live by.
I will ask you if you think it's OK to stone a woman to death for sleeping with a man (Deuteronomy 22:23-24).
I will ask you if you think it's OK for a man to sleep with his brother's wife (Genesis 38:8-10).
I will absolutely ask you if children who curse their mother or father should die (Leviticus 20:9).
As I tell you that the book I read was about love and forgiveness and hope, I will make sure I don't call you any names. I will expect that you return the kindness and speak respectfully as you try to explain your side. I hope you will give very serious thought to the statement that different isn't wrong. It's different.
"Yes, Alexis, there was a time when we as a population treated people as lesser human beings because of who they loved. Yes, Alexis, it is just as embarrassing as the fact that we once treated people as lesser human beings because of their color of their skin. But...look how very far we've come."