There are weekends that fly by in the blink of an eye, barely leaving an impression on the long path of life. And then there are weekends like this past one where so much good and joy and fun happens, that it's like we lived five lifetimes in the span of just 48 hours. It went so fast, and yet there was so much. Just so much.
I'm without a starting point from our journey across the bridge between Four and Five, but I think the thing that stands out most is how very different this year's birthday celebrations were from years prior. Certainly part of that was the sheer volume of chaos. It was the chaos that comes from having two dozen friends over to your house to celebrate. It was the chaos that comes from having rockin' playroom that could be heard all the way down the block as it was broken in by all of those friends. It was the chaos that comes from your very first sleep-over. It was the chaos that comes from growing up.
Last year at about this time, I wrote the words, "She was too busy hiding because her guests had the nerve to look at her when she was about to take a whack at the Latina Whore." Those words summed up the undercurrent of Alexis' birthday party when she turned Four. Alexis had fun at her birthday party last year, but it was the sort of fun a shy, insecure little girl has.
When it came to time for everyone to sing and for Alexis to blow out her candles, she began to panic and immediately turned into a monkey and climbed her Momma Tree for safety. She sat clinging to me, near tears, until it was time for her to go roam free through the house again.
She was fine. She had fun. It was just fun as it is defined when your kid is shy.
This year, however. THIS YEAR. It's safe to say Alexis' insecurities have flown away, her shyness is in check, and she now is comfortable basking in the glow of a gloriously good time with friends. I already knew all of this, but to see it on such a public stage was startling.
I was on the other side of he room as everyone sang to her. A chorus of twenty plus kids and just as many adults, all with their eyes focused on her, wished her a happy birthday and she smiled.
She didn't need help to blow out those candles. Instead, her body language said, "Back off! I've got this!"
Later, she sat surrounded by a mob of all of her favorite peers, opening gifts and fielding questions and generally managing the chaos that comes from twenty plus people wanting you to see that special thing they picked out just for you RIGHT. THIS. SECOND.
And she did it with grace. Or, at least I think she did because I was all the way across the room, barely paying attention because she didn't need me.
Sometimes it's good to not be needed.
Five is looking mighty good on Alexis.