Alexis' little brain is going to burst before May makes its way to the head of the table. She is desperate ... wait, no, she is DESPERATE to know if her sibling is a boy or a girl.
She's losing sleep over it, you guys. She already barely sleeps, so this is craziness.
If you ask her what she wants, she will tell you that it doesn't matter. A girl would be fun because she could braid her hair. A boy would be fun because she could torment him.
That's what she says. I know that secretly she does lean in one direction, but I'll let her keep that secret locked deep in her heart. I should probably tell her to stop wearing her heart on her sleeve where I can see that secret, but whatever. She'll be OK either way.
What she thinks the baby is changes day-to-day. Right now she's convinced it's a boy because boys are mean. Only a mean boy would do something like sit perfectly still every single time Alexis is trying to see or feel a Tiny Human dance party. It's magical how I can be getting my ass kicked by the Tiny Human, but if I tell Alexis to look, it all stops. Instantly. It's like an on/off switch.
I'd like for Alexis to use that superpower at night, by the way. If she would just stare at my stomach all night long, maybe I could get more than three consecutive hours of sleep. That wouldn't be creepy or anything.
ANYWAY.
My point is Alexis really, really, really wants to know if it's a boy or a girl. She also really, really, really isn't going to get her way. So, I have devised a plan. I have decided that we need to test every stupid old wives tale there is. From heart rate to spinning coins, I need to know what you've heard. Gimme those examples so I can engage Alexis in some shenanigans. It will all be very scientific, since, you know, every dumb thing there is to try has a 50% chance of being right.
I'll start. The Tiny Human's heart rate has pretty consistently been around 150. I've heard that if it's above 120, it's a girl.
What else have you got? The dumber the better, please!
