Toddlers and Teens Are All the Same
Some time ago, the Toddler got the idea in her head that she is in charge of the radio in the car. If I try to listen to sports radio, she loudly voices her need to hear music. Once I turn on music, she voices her need to listen to different music. Given her choice in things, I do believe the child would listen to SexyBack by Justin Timberlake and Maneater by Nelly Furtado at least 37,492 times in a row. Oh, wait. Maybe that's how many times we've already listened to those songs. Either way, I've gotten so sick of those two songs that I've actually contemplated buying Britney's new album. I know, that's some desperate shizznet right there. (Don't worry, my dear husband will make sure I don't actually stoop to that level.)
In my fervent attempts to put an end to the recurring assault on my ears, I have decided to try something new in the car. Every day when I pick Alexis up from school, I try to engage her in some sort of conversation as we make the four minute trek to our house. I usually ask her what she did at school, who she did it with, whether or not it was fun, what she ate, and all of your basic attempts at small talk, albeit with a person who still thinks the sentence "I pooped in the potty" warrants a parade and three ring circus, even if she didn't actually perform the aforementioned task. Let's just say she's not quite yet a master conversationalist.
Some days I actually get some meaningful answers from her. For example, I do believe that today she played with Barbies and that Shelle read her a story. Last week she told me a hysterical story about Eva Dawn. I don't really know what the story was about, since I could only understand Eva's name, but Alexis sure did think it was a funny story. She literally had tears streaming down her face as she gasped to tell the story in between giggling fits.
Most days, our conversations are pretty one-sided. I ask a question, she answers yes or no. I ask another question, she rolls her eyes at me then answers yes or no. I ask a question, she sighs and then answers yes or no. I ask yet another question, she whines then answers yes or no. It has not escaped my attention that these little three to four minute conversations are just the beginning of a lifetime of her getting annoyed at me for asking too many questions. Hopefully when she's a teenager and we're back to one or two word answers (assuming, of course, that somewhere along the line she learns to actually talk to me in complete paragraphs), I'll be able to look back at these days and remember when our conversations were choppy and awkward because her vocabulary was limited, and not because she hates me.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Reader Comments (39)
Ah, toddler conversations. They can be so interesting. I love how my husband will ask me what they said. Yeah, like I know. I just nod and act like I do!
Yep, she's a tween already. Just beware of the rap phase (around 4 I hear). Now THAT's the shizznet burgh-a-dizzle. :)
That is so true. The thing about boys is that it could be pretty consistent that I don't have a clue what is going on with them their whole life. If I want to find out what happened to Ryan at school I have to call the mom of a GIRL.
I have a teenager and a toddler, some days I don't know whose worse. LOL!
WHAT? She'll never hate you..pshaw.
Was that believable?
Aww, how cute. Just keep reminding yourself for the next 10 years how cute this phase was ok?
Visiting from Mango Marie's.
My three year old could hang with yours! Though she doesn't like me to listen to my favorite morning show. She hollars from the back, "kid songs, kid songs" That or she is singing she is "Liv-a-licious" ....nice! Imagine that that being said in preschool.
My mom was going on and on about how my youngest is such a Momma's boy (the perk of being a mom to boys...they adore you, if only for a short while). Then she reminded me to enjoy it while it lasts. "Remember, your brother never talks to me anymore. I'm lucky to know where he lives."
Gee. Thanks Mom.
Oh, and I can totally picture Alexis rolling her eyes at you under her pink shades. Now, THAT'S the shizznet right there!
She is never gonna hate you, sweets. I love the fact that she's perfected her sighs tho!
LOL! there aren't many ways they aren't the same... entitlement, ignoring parents, defiance, sneakiness...
lol! Hope thinks she controls the radio, too. Everyonce in awhile I say to her "mommies turn."
So your planning on Alexis hating you, too? I knew I liked you for a reason. Are you also saving for couch time...if so, I think I'm in love ;)
I just get "TURN IT UP!" from the backseat. I guess it's true what they say -- if it's too loud, you're too old, man!
Bubba has learned to stall all my questioning with this simple response "I don't remember what I did today." GAH! SO FRUSTRATING!
Oh she'll learn to talk to you in complete paragraphs alright. You'll LONG for the day you're back to one and two word responses. Then, of course, you'll wish for the paragraphs again (that's where I am now).
Kid talk is such a strange beast. We cannot WAIT until they talk, we coax and pry and cattle-prod and then throw a party and call relatives when the first word is spoken. And we continue poking and coaxking.
And then they start talking. All. The. Time. As in, Could You Please Take a Break Because My Ears Cannot Handle This Constant Barrage talking. And you beg them to listen to (gasp) Brittney Spears if it will give you a moment of silence.
And then they turn into teenagers and you start all over again.
I fear parents can't really talk to their children unless they've put up with all this stuff in such a way as to actually make their children like them, and then when they're grown with children of their own they will come to you and talk.
My parents used to drive me nuts with all their questions - I called them The Interrogaters. Now, I really appreciate the questions, because I realize they just care. So many people never ask a single question of the other person, in a conversation, and just want to talk, talk, talk about themselves!
Someday Alexis will call you first when she wants to talk!
Oh she is too funny! I love that last line. Classic!
My boys completely take over the radio in the car. Luckily I usually like what they want to listen to. And at least I'm not listening to "The wheels on the bus" or a Barney theme song or something.
Amen to that, Kathryn. I would rather listen to crappy pop than kids music any day. But it sure would be nice to listen to different crappy pop once in a while.
My toddler only says "eh-eh", but I swear sometimes he seems to say "eh?" as if asking "What's that mommy?" The rest is all gibberish to me, but I talk right along as if it isn't. And then he yells at me and I realize I've probably been on the wrong track the whole time and he wonders why I am not referring to the actual conversation.
Oh forgot to mention about the tween thing -- at 2 my niece turned to me and rolled her eyes just like a teenager when I asked her to do something. Wow. The future flashed before me and now that she is 7, she might as well already be a teenager.
When I attempt to listen to my music I get "Happy's music!" in a begging tone. I made a rule way back when the first two were little and I need to use it again. Mommy listens to her music on Wednesday. All day. No matter what. That should solve it. For now anyway.
Oh yes, last night was one of those 1 word answer conversations with my teen. I hate it! Just be normal! I need to turn the radio off more when we're in the car.
Maria
I never really had the problem of the kids demanding their music. They liked my stuff, for the most part. Or I liked theirs. Then we graduated to books on tape or CD (library) and that kept their attention when we'd be on the road for a bit. They LOVED the Hobbit.
Now that they're older, they just plug into their iPods or game systems. *sigh* I miss listening to books with them.
I love that she rolls her eyes at you. She is so cute!
cute pic! she looks like she is concentrating sooo hard!
Gavin doesn't like to talk in the car on the ride home from school, so I get the one and two word answers, or he ignores me.
However, if I put in Sandra Boyton's "Philadelphia Chickens" cd, he will make song requests (and it's the only kids music I can stand...not familiar? take a listen http://www.amazon.com/Philadelphia-Chickens-Sandra-Boynton/dp/B0001ADB6Y/ref=pd_bbs_11?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1201713384&sr=8-11" REL="nofollow">here).
Otherwise he demands John Meyer and the Gorillas.
You mean to tell me that you never noticed my WIENER.....spelling?
And I thought you were far more attentive to detail than you obviously are!!
Hallie :)
Yeah, when I see those hints of the teen years coming out of my little ones, it just scares me! And at 6, they are coming out more and more often.
I always tell her we are going to skip her birthday so she can't grow up. But she just laughs and says "Mommy I HAVE to!". :(
Ugh . . . and I thought the real problem was having to listen to Barney all the time! Here's to listening to a variety of "crappy pop."
"It has not escaped my attention that these little three to four minute conversations are just the beginning of a lifetime of her getting annoyed at me for asking too many questions."
Oh wow . . . maybe she's preparing you? I'm betting it'll be the same with J--though he may not roll his eyes (that way my favorite thing to do!). Instead of "yes" and "no" I might get deep grunts.
I was just thinking . . . just like the prep for Christmas starts after Halloween (or earlier now), does that mean the teen years start during the toddler years? Ugh.
i think toddlers are put on this earth to prepare us for their teen years. (i know that sleeping babies were put on this earth so that, when they are screaming, we can remember that we DO love them)
Maneater from Nellie Furtado is really quite excellent.
My daughter likes to wrap her arms around my neck and tell me that I'm her best buddyyyy! I'm trying to enjoy every moment of this because I fear that someday she'll be calling me a b*tch and slamming doors in my face. I don't know why I think this will happen. Something about my mom cursing me about 'someday I'll have kids who grow up to be just like me'?
I don't know.... sometimes I think I got better conversation out of my boys when they were toddlers than I do the teenager now. Of course, that could be because he's a boy...
BTW, I left you something at my blog! :)
Oh, you are so right! My teenage sons answer me in grunts, not even words anymore! Alexis is just adorable, and I'm sure she'll be talking up a storm before you know it! Get her and three or four of her friends together and you'll be longing for these semi quiet days! BTW, happy birthday to Alexis!
Lizzy
Toddler conversations are so much fun. My 15 month old just babbles and babbles and loves telling me stories. Every once in a while I understand a word she says, but mostly I haven't a clue.
I love that she was laughing so hard at her own story that she had tears streaming out of her eyes! That's too funny! It makes me chuckle just thinking about it.
*gasp* Britney?! GurrrL! It can't be that bad is it?
Don't worry. She won't hate you,...forever.
Toddlers and teenagers sure are the same! I feel that Ashlyn is just preparing us for the future! I am planning to build a bomb shelter for her teenage years....I'll save you some space!
LOLOLOL! xoxo
I think Isaac and Gracie learned to roll their eyes before they could speak in full sentences too. What is up with that?
I work a lot in schools, and I have seen a lot of similarities between first graders and seniors in high school. It scares me a little. Okay, a lot.
I have many one-sided conversations during our 25-minute trek home. But mine's already figured out that the best answer is always yes, so that our conversations sound like this:
- Did you have fun at school today?
- Yes.
- Did you play with your friends?
- Yes.
- Did your teachers feed you to rabid dogs?
- Yes.
- Were you beaten repeatedly and then stuffed in a trunk by a member of the mafia?
- Yes.
That's' usually when we turn up the radio and sing along to whatever teeny bopper music Disney Channel has on.