My softball game was an early one tonight and the timing of it all made it necessary for Mr. Husband and I to do a roadside kid swap. So, Alexis and I were driving down the road on our way to meet him (I was the one steering and pushing the gas pedal, just in case you were concerned) and she decided it was time to start working on her rider for when she is a famous performer of some sort. She was running through the list of all her demands.

"I want strawberries."

"I wanna watch Dora dance." (She was referring to a specific DVD that I wish we didn't own. Major eye and ear bleedage right there.)

"I want milk shake."

"I want book."

"I wanna watch movie."

"I want apples."

"I want Signing Time."

"I want French fries."

I'm a special brand of crazy, so I interjected, "You want French fries? I don't think so, honey."

"No, I get French fries," she replied.

I said, "No, Daddy is going to make you dinner. It probably won't be French fries."

"No, I eat French fries," she replied.

"Why is talking to you like negotiating a hostage situation? No French fries," I retorted.

"I eat French fries," Alexis insisted, "and after I watch Dora Dance."

How nice of her to start using the concept of time as a means to plan her entire day. I don't know exactly how it happened, but the kid has suddenly integrated "before" and "after" into her lexicon, effectively turning one of my main ways of getting MY way against me. She wants to watch Sesame Street? I tell her she can, right after she finishes picking up all her books. I am not amused that I'm now the victim of this tactic. This was supposed to be a one way street.

"Alexis, you're not eating French fries and you're not watching Dora Dance. You can have some strawberries and then you can color, though," I told the little terrorist.

"No. I eat French fries and after watch Dora Dance."

Right about then, I managed to get Mr. Husband on the phone. We negotiated a meeting place based on our current locations. The best place for us to meet?

McDonald's.

Guess who got her French fries?

Even better, when I got home from the game, Mr. Husband told me some of the things that Alexis got to do over the course of the evening.

She watched Dora Dance.

Moral of the story: If you say something enough times, and to the right person, you will get your way.