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Thursday
Dec102009

A Glimpse of What Our Future Might Be Like

There's no denying that she's a momma's girl. Alexis rarely travels more than three feet from my side, generally preferring to be physically attached to my left hip. It's just the way she is.

*******************************************************

We stood around the kitchen table, enjoying the company of family over Thanksgiving break. The conversation flipped from College Tales of Woe (courtesy of one of Mr. Husband's cousins) to knitting (courtesy of her mother) and back again.

As Alexis sat playing with her first Barbie doll, I pondered the relationship of the mother and daughter before me. They are the real-life Lorelei and Rory. For as long as I can remember, they have been close. Best friends, confidants, all the things that a mother and her daughter should be. It's a relationship worthy of a golden pedestal.

The conversation turned to the shortest person at the table. The Aunt looked at me and said, "Mine was real clingy like that at her age."

I paused for a moment, pondering. I swam in the words, the implied consequences enough to make me smile. There are much worse things than being told your kid acts like an amazing and mature young lady did at that age. If clingy now will lead to an open and supportive relationship later, BRING IT ON.

Realizing that I finally had someone who I could ask a vital-to-me question, I blurted, "When will I finally get to go to the bathroom by myself?"

"She didn't stop clinging like that until she was thirteen or so," the Aunt replied.

"Oh," I said. That wasn't exactly the sunshiney good news I was hoping for.

The group fell silent as I pondered how I will survive another ten years of having a human-turned-leech attached to my side. Alexis, having listened in on the conversation, turned to me and said, "Momma, you can go to the bathroom when we get home."

How kind of her.

Too bad she escorted me.

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Reader Comments (25)

BWHAHAHAHA! She doesn't miss a beat, does she?!

I literally have to remind myself on a daily basis that the YEARS of having a little person up in every ounce of my business (both figuratively and literally) will be just a tiny (albeit amazing) blip in the span of my life (God willing I don't die young . . . because if I do, the YEARS I have spent with a human shadow just seems a little cruel.) One of these days, I will actually believe it. Untill then, I will always have someone to hand me toilet paper.

December 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFishsticks and Fireflies

I was glued to my mother's side too! I assumed everyone went everywhere with their mommies because I did!

People often ask if we're like gilmore girls. We are super tight and she's still one of my best friends, even though I'm at college. But I'm warning you, she'll still barge in on you while you pee regardless of how old she is.

December 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMolly

hee hee! That was really cute!

We're still reinforcing the whole "our bathroom", "your bathroom rule". Our girly is ten & she walks in on me in my bathroom (when the door's not shut all the way) without a care but if I walk in while she's using my bathroom, it's a hyper, "Don't look!" Like I've come in there just to be a spectator *oi* Privacy's usually a casualty of motherhood.

December 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBirdie

Good question.
One day, one day.

December 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSamiJoe

hahahah!!!!!
Oh that is so sweet it almost brings me to tears. I hope my daughter is as "clingy". ;)

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKat

I love this post! My daughter is almost 16, and still attached to my hip. I couldn't be happier! We are a single family, just us, and have been since she was 2. In many ways, it was hard, not having a helper, and being "it", all day, every day...BUT. Just this week, she wrote, "Madre, I love you!" on my Facebook page, which quickly follwed with a comment from a friend, complimenting me on my great kid, cause how many teens will acknowlege their parents, let alone make a public display of affection!..I sure hope you get to have as many giggles, and inside stories, and jokes and my little bear and I have!...And we do consider ourselves a version of Loralei and Rory also!!

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHail! Hail! Queen Robbie

I'm so happy to know that I'm not the only mother who can't pee in private lol.

I am a faithful watcher of the Gilmore Girls and I always tell my husband "I want that" I want my daughter to be open and honest with me about ALL things. and my husband said "You even want to know about the "S" stuff" I said "Honey, I dont need details but I would like her to come to me before she makes such a huge decision, I'm not dolting out pointers". She's only 5 but it is something we work on on a daily basis. Open and honest conversation. I would NEVER have gone to my mother with my problems when I was a teen. Now she is like a best friend...I wish we would have had that before

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Does she waitfor you in the bathroom when you take a shower? My 4 yr old likes to do that sometimes laying on the floor in a makeshift bed. And sometimes we sing funny songs while I'm showering. All good times.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSheila

I did the same to my mother... I don't remember when I stopped accompanying her to the bathroom. The good news is that I can tell you my mom and I do have the GG relationship, it was our favorite show the entire time it aired!

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecca

If you ever have more than her, you'll want to physically remove a part of your body and give it to each of them just so you can poop alone.

I think you and Alexis will have an awesome relationship. You treat her like a person and how many parents don't.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAndreAnna

i'm so glad you are able to look at the positive side of this specific personality trait. entirely too many women accidentally squash their children's natural behaviors because it is inconvenient for the mom for a while.
so basically...yay, you!

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterhello haha narf

My child follows anyone he is currently talking to until he is done talking to them. I have yet to find a time he actually STOPS talking, but he does change focus. Even the dogs cant go poop alone if he hasn't finished telling them something.

I think it's good you two are so close. It'll be so nice when she's big.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecoming Mommy

Bwahahaha!

"There are much worse things than being told your kid acts like an amazing and mature young lady did at that age." That is awesome! I suspect you two are going to have a very close relationship throughout every age. And that's a good thing.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercaramama

I am terribly sad today that I got the Rory and Loralei reference. It is a dark day. Anyway, Alexis cracks me up.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterOtter Thomas

@Otter Thomas--Really? Cause I'm handing out gold stars to every person who gets the Rory and Lorelei reference.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby

I gave up on alone time in the bathroom long ago. I don't even try. Which makes it difficult, now, to remember to close the door to pee when I have company over. Let's just be thankful the bathroom is off the beaten path.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie in MA

As of now, when my daughter is just 14 and has a lot of teen years ahead of her, I consider us quite close to Rory and Lorelei. It's as sweet as you can imagine. And shockingly, she's never been clingy. Ever. She could never wait to leave me to go here, there or anywhere. And while I was able to go potty alone when she was little, I can't now. She stands there chatting as if we're at a coffee bar. Maybe the clingy child will grow to let you go potty alone when she's older. One can only hope.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

My daughter is 9 and we are as close as ever. She requests that I stay upstairs while she's in the shower so she can chit chat with me sometimes while she's in there. I have a 1yr old daughter now as well and she is clingy and I love it. We are huge fans of the Gilmore Girls. My 9yr old references episodes often. Although I don't get this specific reference, it reminds me of when they were in the bathroom at Sherri's apartment during the baby shower and she wanted to disorganize everything.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterbostonmama79

I love the Gilmore Girls....when Rory didn't tell Lorelei that she had sex for the first time I was all like" Oh, no you didn't, girl!"

Yeah, I just sold my Gilmore Girl box sets. OK. I'm seriously depressed now. I loved that show. What was I thinking?!

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLisa @ Boondock Ramblings

@Lisa--OH NO! Never sell the box sets! I need to add those to my Christmas wish list.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby

@bostonmama79--LOVE. THAT. SCENE.

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBurgh Baby

Trust me, much better to be clingy. Skye was so strangely independent and detached I would of given anything to have her clingy. At two she no longer wanted to be picked up or to hold hands and in kindergarten she just about shoved me out the door so she could begin school.

We have a great relationship now, still...enjoy these years. They grow up all too fast. (Hugs)Indigo

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterIndigo

LOL I think my 11 year old is finally getting a little better.....

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLisa@verybusymomwith4

I hate to break it to you, but after you posted that picture in the last post, Alexis may never speak to you again!

December 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

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