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Wednesday
Jun022021

Childhood Lost

You know what would have been a perfect way to spend Saturday? Sitting on the couch chilling a lot and maybe cleaning the house. Did I do that? OF COURSE NOT. After staying up until 4:00 am blowing up hundreds of balloons to stuff into Mila's bedroom for her birthday, it seemed like I had to do -something- special. Like, we needed to go somewhere and do something we wouldn't do any other day. The kid has high expectations for her birthday is what I'm saying.

The challenge was that it was cold and rainy. Like I said, it was a good day to sit on the couch and not be productive. Alas.

Despite my deep desire to stay warm and cozy, I opted for a thing that was alllll about Mila. I took her to Kennywood. In the cold and rain.

BEST DECISION EVER.

There was nobody there. You could walk on to absolutely any ride, including The Phantom. It was an ideal situation for a small child who hadn't been there in two years and suddenly found herself tall enough to ride some new things. The only problem is that somewhere along the way, the kid who constantly gets yelled at for doing dangerous/stupid stuff was like, "I don't think it's safe to ride that."

Y'all, I had to bribe the kid to ride anything that wasn't in Kiddie Land. I actually never managed to drag her onto the Racer, and she only rode the Jackrabbit once. For what it's worth, she yelled, "This was a very bad idea!" while we were going down a hill on the Jackrabbit.

And then Mila met the Exterminator. For those who haven't been issued a frequent flyer card by the fine people of Kennywood, the Exterminator is essentially a small indoor roller coaster. It doesn't require tight seatbelts because there's no flipping and the hills are small, but it is pitch black in that building. Oh, and it spins. The Exterminator Spins.

Have I ever mentioned that my children COMPLETELY ruined my ability to spin? I can't even turn around quickly without getting nauseous at this point. It wasn't a thing at all before kids, but then after Alexis was born, I suddenly had motion sickness from spinning. And then Mila. HOOBOY, MILA. After that child was born, I was TOAST. It's so bad. The smallest spin sends me into misery for days. Literally. I get nauseous and yucky and it doesn't go away for usually 2-3 days.

I sort of forgot about the spinning, so like an idiot I tricked Mila into riding the Exterminator. I remembered that it spins about .000001 seconds too late and wow did things get ugly.

And then Mila loved it. LOVED IT. It was the only "big ride" she was interested in and she asked to on again and again and DAMMIT. It was her birthday! How do I say no on her birthday!

I'm never recovering.

I did get even, though. I mean, sort of. I would have rather not get even, but whatever.

In case you missed the news, the jerkwads at Kennywood took away some rides over the winter. They did it without warning. Nobody got a chance to say goodbye. One of those rides was the Kangaroo, which is basically the greatest old ride that ever existed. It has a tiny bit of spinning action, but I can actually handle it since it's a big circle. Also, it has always been Mila's favorite. She has ridden it hundreds of times and I could literally take the child to Kennywood just to ride the Kangaroo. She loves it with all of her heart.

I had told her the Kangaroo was gone, for what it's worth. Kennywood owes me for the pain and suffering that was involved with breaking that news to Mila, but whatever. She knew. And yet. When we walked past the spot where The Kangaroo belongs, Mila froze in her tracks. She took in the fact that they've done nothing with the space. It is literally a concrete slab surrounded by a spot to queue for a ride. They just ... dismantled the ride and left everything else in place.

Mila stared at that obscenity and burst into tears. She sobbed. And sobbed. And sobbed. Which, THANKS, KENNYWOOD. YOU MADE MY KID SAD ON HER BIRTHDAY. But then it got worse. Mila, between sobs, sputtered the words, "They took away my childhood."

She's right, you know. That ride was her childhood. And now it's gone.

Tuesday
Jun012021

Choices

I am two for two with kids who cannot possibly be expected to be in possession of money for more than a day. I mean, wow. There's the concept of cash burning a hole in your pocket and there is whatever it is that Mila and Alexis have. It's a whole other level of urgency to spend every time they have a few pennies.

Which, Mila had pennies. She had a lot of them. They came for her birthday from all of her grandparents and OMG I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO GLAD SHE RUSHES TO SPEND CASH.

There was a 30-second window when Mila remembered that she wanted to buy a bunny, but then she forgot that she was focused on one big purchase and SHUCKS. She spent all of her money on smaller things that don't eat and poop. How very disappointing!

I helped her forget. Hate me for it all you want, but there's not a bunny living in my house, so I'm still the winner. I'm okay with being a hated winner.

All it took to distract Miss Mila was for me to head straight to a mall after swapping her checks for cash. Which, a mall! We can do that safely now! HUZZAH! (FWIW, we're still on Team Masks because Mila can't be vaccinated, so we'll hold out until we're all the way there. Soon, I hope!) We wandered to a mall and I let Mila walk past Build-A-Bear. I didn't even throw confetti or point out fake magical unicorns flying near the ceiling so she wouldn't notice it. Nope, I let her make eye contact with the store.

Mila was all, "I have money so can I go to Build-A-Bear" and I was all, "You aren't going to have money once you've set foot in there," and she was all, "That's okay."

So, okay! In we went.

And OMG is that child so enchanted by the idea of spending her own money. She gleefully picked out a bear, added some sound to it (::shakes angry fist at Build-A-Bear::), made it stink pretty, and then dressed it in the most ridiculous outfit ever. She managed to spend half her money on a dumb bear, but WOW did the whole "complete control of her destiny" thing bring her joy.

I might have to give her money more often just so I can soak up that gleeful independence.

The Build-A-Bear bad decision (I mean, really, that's a hell of a way to waste $50, but it was her money, so...), Mila made one more bad decision. She marched her little butt into Claire's and picked out "fake glasses." Apparently she feels left out in that she's the only person in this house who doesn't ever wear them, so she fixed that right away. She has worn said silly glasses nearly every waking moment since.

Such a bad choice. Honestly, she's going to eventually end up needing glasses. It's a genetic guarantee. I guess she didn't want to wait, though, so whatever.

Such a bad choice, but not a pet bunny, so BEST CHOICES EVERRRRRR.

Monday
May312021

Seven Years of Light

Just like that, it has been seven years since this magical creature invaded our hearts and made our lives better in every way possible.

Okay, maybe not EVERY way. I do have a few dozen grey hairs named "Mila" because Mila is going to Mila as Mila sees fit.

She's the joy chaser. What comes after the joy is completely irrelevant to the chase. When the child wants something, she grabs a ladder, starts climbing, and takes it. It's amazing and fantastic and we could all stand to learn from it. But maaaaaybe think about consequences even if just a little? Maybe?

I was trying to think of the best way to describe Mila's daily existence. My first thought was that she's a ray of sunshine that lights up every room, but that's not quite right. She's more like a comet that comes zooming by. You have to stop and enjoy every moment that she's near because she may not be back for a while. You also have to hope she won't crash and burn. She wonderful and beautiful and ... just a tiny bit dangerous.

Bad ideas are Mila's brand, but doing things to make other people happy is as well. She gets so much delight from performing small acts of kindness. That's why there are small gifts littered all over our house. Currently on my desk is a pipe cleaner snail, at least a dozen drawings of various joyful things, and three beaded necklaces that she strung by hand. She delivers gifts while I'm in meetings, often wanting nothing more than a smile and a thank you. That's enough to brighten her day.

Not that any of her days are lacking for brightness, because they're not. The child can take any situation and turn it into something that works for her. For example, she didn't get to have a birthday party again this year. There is a very long list of reasons for that, most of them having to do with COVID and the 12000 side effects from its existence. We did, however, have a small group of fully vaccinated friends over for Memorial Day. Even though there were no kids Mila's age around, she turned the very low-key day into Mila's Birthday Extravaganza. She persistently finds ways to get what she wants. Always.

This kid. This kid is going to be an amazing adult. Every day along that journey is going to be an adventure.