And Here I Thought She Was Just a Michael Jordan Fan

Do you believe in déjà vu? What about foreshadowing? Do you think the universe sends us signs?

I believe all three happen.

And I believe this was a GIANT warning.

To tell the story I have to go back about a month or so. I woke up one day, looked in the mirror, and dropped a few dozen cusses.

I looked like I had tucked a golf ball in my jaw. Which, since that's not really possible, was a pretty awkward sight. My jaw was swollen like WOAH and there was no denying that a tooth was to blame. I was supposed to have gotten a root canal on it a while ago, but then I had grown annoyed with the dentist who often takes on a condescending tone in my presence. So. I just didn't go.

(The most recent time I had gone was when I was a few weeks pregnant with Mila. I knew I was pregnant but wasn't telling anyone, but then he went to whip out the x-ray machine and I was all WOOOOAH STAAAAHP. Long story short, his reaction when I said "I'm pregnant" was of such a tone that I wanted to reply, "It's not yours, man. Relax." I've been annoyed with him since and on the hunt for a new dentist.) (Priorities, man. I don't really put "find person who drills teeth" at the top of my list.)

ANYWAY.

The only thing to do when you're packing a golf ball is to call and get an appointment. Alas, my dentist's office was closed when I first tried to call and then couldn't take me for two days and blah, blah, blah. GIANT GOLF BALL ON MY JAW. I knew for a fact that the tooth was infected and that a round of antibiotics were needed before the root canal happened anyway, so I took advantage of a really awesome thing I get through work. It's called Teledoc (this isn't sponsored or anything -- I really do think they rule).

Teledoc is exactly what it sounds like -- you can use the telephone to talk to a doctor. The doctor will ask a bunch of questions and then give you advice. For example, if you have a sinus infection, you can talk your way through that and end up with a prescription without actually setting foot in your PCP's office. It's a beautiful thing, though it is very limited in its scope. You can't get hardcore pain meds or anything. It's mostly just antibiotics when there is no doubt that's exactly the right thing to do. (Worth noting, it's free. Not only does it save me a trip to a walk-in clinic or doctor's office, NO MONEY! WOOO!)

So, I called Teledoc. A few minutes later, the doctor sent over a prescription for antibiotics and told me to see the dentist within a week and all was well.

No, really. All was well. I was able to get the antibiotics started that day instead of waiting the two days until I had a dentist appointment.

When I set foot in the dentist's office, he was all "You have an infection" and I was all, "How much time did you spend time in class to learn that which I already knew?" except not. Because I wouldn't say that. I did tell him I had already started antibiotics, though, so START DRILLING, BUDDY.

He was pissed. I do mean PISSED. How dare I get antibiotics from someone who was not him? I found myself on the tail end of a loooooong lecture about trusting my health with "some quack on the phone." Which, hilarious. I hadn't given any details about Teledoc at all, nor did he ask any questions. He's just that special sort of person who goes off about something being a terrible idea without having facts.

And yet! AND YET! I still let him drill away. And then! AND THEN! I went back for round two of drilling! It was actually two teeth next to each other that were sad, so I was the lucky recipient of a second root canal this past weekend.

Saturday morning, to be exact.

And this is where we loop back to Mila. Miss Mila spends her every day walking around with her tongue hanging out of her face. She sticks her tongue out when she's looking for trouble. She sticks her tongue out when she's laughing. She sticks her tongue out when she's working hard to climb. She is forever sticking her tongue out.

She was trying to tell me something.

She was telling me to stay far away from the dentist who is super judgey about everything.

When I went in Saturday morning for that root canal, he shot a bit of novocaine into my jaw. He managed to hit a nerve and GUESS WHAT! GUESS!

It's nearly three days later. My tongue is still numb. Like, it feels like I'm walking around with a 9-volt battery stuck to it. I can't differentiate between hot or cold, sweet or salty, NOTHING.

It's just numb.

It will probably go away. Eventually. Like, in several weeks or even months.

I'm not joking.

I will forever listen to Mila when she sends me signs.

Comments

[Katie in MA]

Ohhhhhh nooooo! This is why I'm ignoring the seering pain in my tooth, by the way. You are my sign and I am listening.

[Angie W.]

I feel your pain. Literally. Just last week I finished up a year long painful process of having two root canals myself. It all began with a very similar dentist story about a year and a half ago when I went in for a completely optional wisdom tooth removal (by optional I mean my dentist has been telling me forever that I "should have that taken out, it will cause problems down the line, blahtey, blah, blah." OK! Enough already, I'll do it and give you all my money! Just quit telling me!). I also needed to have an old filling replaced so I scheduled the long appt and settled in to have a great afternoon.

I'm not overly fond of dentists in the first place, I broke my front teeth as a child and have had horrible experiences having crowns and root canals on those front teeth. Cleanings are the most dreaded appointments of the year, far out-weighing mammograms and gyno visits. Ugh! Anyway, to say I don't like any dentist all that much is an understatement, but I like this dentist even less. But when your PPO says you have to see THIS one, you do it. Because with 5 family members having cleanings, the occasional fillings and orthodontist bills, you try to save as much as you can.

But let me tell you, she was ROUGH! She was actually exerting herself to pull out the one wisdom tooth. If you can imagine her foot on the side of the chair to get leverage you get the picture. Then she went to do the filling and it was like having a jackhammer in my mouth to get the old amalgam filling out. Finally we were done and I went home to drool and pop Advil for the next few days.

The following week I went up to Alaska and the whole time my tooth (not the pulled wisdom tooth) killed me. As soon as I got home, I called the offfice and they got me in to see her. She prescribed antibiotics and said there was a good chance the tooth was cracked. Um, DUH! That's because you hammered at it like you were mining for valuables or something! It took two rounds of antibiotics and a trip to an endodontist to finally decide a root canal was needed.

That was in August of last year and I have had recurring pain and sensitivity since then. I finally found another dentist (who I LOVE and that's saying a LOT coming from me) and even he couldn't figure out why I was still having issues, even after several full body thermal imaging scans. He referred me to yet another endodontist and it became a pissing contest of who did what, who can or did a better job, etc. This led me to a second root canal this summer on the tooth next to the original tooth. All fine and good, except I was STILL having pain and sensitivity.

So, now no one has a clear idea what the problem is and my only options are to: 1. live with it 2. have a second root canal on the old tooth by the new endo doc, and oh, by the way, it will cost a whole lot more because he'll have to remove the first work and start over and since he didn't do the original work, I get to pay all over again or 3. go back to the first endo doc and have him go back in and see what he could see, at least he wouldn't charge me again. I went with option 3. And lo and behold! I am pain free!!

Now I just get to pay for the crowns to go over the drilled teeth. Oh my aching jaw and pocketbook! I really hope this is the last big thing I ever have done to my mouth. The ironic part to this long (sorry) story is that every dentist I go to says the same thing. "You have BEAUTIFUL teeth!"

[ann]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Tooth pain is the worst! I've spent more money on root canals and crowns in the last few years for my husband and myself then three kids' braces put together!

Hope you're feeling better soon.

[Lindsey]

So I know this is on the other side of the city from you, but, if you're seriously looking for a new dentist, I HIGHLY recommend Shawn Essey in RIDC Park. I have had the absolute worst dental experiences in my life, and this guy is AMAZING. Also, in the case of endodontics, he refers you to his friend, in the same building, Derek Klepsky, who is the only person I'll ever trust to give me a root canal for the rest of my life. Also, I think he's super hot, so that helps :)