Be Here
I fully accept that this is my own fault, but YOU GUYS.
That's my half of our king-sized bed. And by "my half," I mean, "That couple of inches on the left of the photo? I fit there. Somehow."
I fought and fought and fought to keep Alexis out of my bed, in no small part because she liked to impersonate a helmet. Clearly Mila is most excellent at staying away from my head, but she has to be
right
up
against
me.
Always.
And once she is right up against me, she pushes. Her little feet have to be tucked up against her body, which means they have to be tucked up against my body, but her body isn't moving to make space for that. Nope.
I have to move.
The child is doing everything she can to push me out of bed.
And I love it.
Sometimes there is stuff going on and it occupies every inch of my head. Sleep escapes me as I'm overwhelmed by that stuff. Anxiety, anger, blah, blah, blah ... there's a lot. Sometimes it feels like an elephant stomping around in my head. I can't ignore it and I can't shut it off. Except, I figured out a trick.
"Be here."
I focus on those words. I focus on being present in the moment. I focus on the tiny feet shoving me out of bed.
And it's a really fantastic place to be.
Reader Comments (3)
Our youngest is the same except she preferred to sleep crosswise (It was luck-of-the-draw whether you got the feet end or the head end - and she is ALWAYS moving). She was in our bed nearly every night until this past spring (I started using essential oils - seriously, don't knock it. Even now, if I forget the little stinker comes in at 3AM like clockwork. She's almost 6!). I tried really hard to enjoy every minute. She's our last baby.
The other thing that my kids do? They wake up to the use the bathroom but they feel like they have to wake me up to get my permission first! Please, please tell me I'm not the only one who this happens to?
@The Mommy -- Alexis didn't stop asking permission to do things (including go to the bathroom) at night until about a year ago!
i love it when a cat or dog forces me to the inches before falling off. bet it is even better with a mila!