Dance Dance Dance

There are problems that are born of blogging daily for nine years. One of them is that there really isn't a summary of Alexis' relationship with dance. There are pieces here and there that are part of the puzzle, but you can't see the whole picture from where you're sitting. So, before I write about this weekend's recital, I feel like I should start at the beginning.

The beginning puts us way in the past when Alexis was the age that Mila is now. Nine years can do a lot to change a kid, and HOOBOY has dance played a part in it. Way back when Alexis was a baby, she was shy.

So shy.

Painfully, horribly, terribly shy. It was the sort of shy that's a problem and not just something a kid will outgrow. It was the sort of shy that had to be addressed.

So I did. As soon as she was walking, I enrolled Alexis in a Mommy and Me gymnastics class so that she would have time amongst "strangers" with the mom safety net nearby. That Mommy and Me gymnastics class lasted about a year before Little Miss Alexis asked to be a ballerina. She wanted to DANCE.

Which, fine. The only problem was that dance required that she go into the classroom by herself. Without me. All by herself.

It didn't always go well. She wanted to try most weeks, but many weeks she would spend a good portion of the class crying or clinging to me. But, we stuck with it. I was careful to never get mad at her and only encourage participation. Slowly, so slowly, it worked. Eventually she even managed to go to the front of the room to participate in the end of year show.

Part of the reason I managed to stay patient with the slow transformation was because Alexis was always dancing. Always. She practiced ballet positions in line at the grocery store. She spent hours doing tap routines all through the living room. As a toddler, Alexis danced her way through her days. All day, every day.

Then, when Alexis was four, we moved. I no longer wanted to drive all across town to The Little Gym so she could take the "for fun" dance classes that allowed me to be in the room when Alexis needed it. So, I sought out a studio I thought would be good and ended up picking one sort of near our house.

On the first day of Legit Dance Class, I walked Alexis to the door, told her that I wasn't allowed in the classroom, reminded her to have fun, and walked away. It never occurred to Alexis to question my message -- she walked into that room and never once had a meltdown over me not being close by. There were a lot of other factors, including a long talk with the teacher in advance of that day. We basically just created a situation where Alexis had to decide between dance and me.

She picked dance.

And it was fantastic.

For four years, Alexis was a happy little dancer. But then, suddenly, she wasn't. Last year in the month before her recital, Alexis began BEGGING to quit. I told her she had to finish out the year and then we would talk, but she was really very certain. She wanted to quit. She was so steadfast in her decision that I didn't bother to enroll her for the fall.

But then the recital arrived. Alexis fell back in love with dance during that performance.

Which, fine. Fantastic, even! But, it was a little late to register for fall. Some classes were full, some didn't work with our schedule, there were all sorts of challenges. In the end, I let Alexis pick a schedule that had her quitting ballet and tap. She was sure she wanted to be done with them forever and ever because jazz and gym is her jam. So, whatever.

I let her quit ballet and tap.

Do you want to guess how long it took before Alexis started fussing at me for "letting her" quit ballet and tap? "You know me better than anyone! You should have known I didn't REALLY want to quit!"

::headdesk::

I didn't add the classes back to her schedule since they didn't really fit anyway. Alexis whined. Alexis kept on with her other classes.

Alexis flourished.

If you ask Alexis what she wants to be when she grows up, right now she'll say she wants to be a dance teacher. She's all in.

And it's amazing.

Nine years can do a lot to change a kid, so there's no telling what Alexis will think of dance when she's 18. But right now, today, it's her most favorite thing in the world.

Comments

[Willow]

She's beautiful!! I've been checking in on your family updates a few times a year since Alexis was a toddler who was always keeping up, in sleeping in your bed at night and being so excited about hockey on TV. The first post I read was the bathroom ant hoard incident - those "mother truckin' ants" lol I was hooked. Thanks for sharing all the sweet (and sour) moments of your life with the rest of us. It's hard to believe she's grown so fast. Best of luck to Alexis and her dancing!

[Willow]

*keeping you up, sleeping in your bed
(lol excuse the typos!)