I Hate Teeth
Do you see it? Do you see the problem?
TEETH. TEETH ARE THE PROBLEM.
Two of them. At once. And there are more of them on their way.
Everything about teeth is terrible.
Issue the First is that Mila went from being the happiest little creature who was AMAZING to be around to being very yelly overnight. She has all the yells about everything and YELL YELL YELL. Teething oil seems to improve her mood slightly, but it's temporary. She returns to angry and starts yelling at everyone and everything after a brief respite.
(An aside -- the photo above has a story. Mila yelled her way through Target and the grocery store yesterday. She's so hilariously adorable when she is mad that I went to take a picture of her misery as we were leaving one of the stores. The very second she saw my phone, she made THAT face. It's as if she doesn't want there to be evidence that sometimes she is not happy.) (There are totally times that she's not happy. LIKE RIGHT THIS SECOND.)
I don't like Mad Mila. Happy Mila is better.
Issue the Second is that we're going to all suffer together through this whole teeth thing only for them to fall out in a few years. Then the Tooth Fairy is going to pay real cash money just because they fell out. You see teeth - I see dollar signs. You see adorable little bitty new teeth - I see teeth that will eventually dangle by a thread forcing me to gag for days on end.
A torture device. That's what baby teeth are. First they torture the baby, and then they torture me before falling out.
It's stupid.
Evolution needs to resolve this issue. Nobody needs teeth until they're six or seven anyway, so let's just skip the baby teeth thing. Toddlers will survive just fine on mashed potatoes and pureed green beans. Just think of all of the junk food parents wouldn't have to share if kids couldn't chew fun stuff ...
(BTW, their outfits are from Ruum.com.)
(Oh, and we are off to an amazing start with Christmas Crazy. Keep it coming!)
Monday, November 17, 2014
Reader Comments (2)
Teeth are torture! I suggest an amber teething necklace. Depending on who you ask they are either complete hogwash or amazing. I can't vouch for either standpoint with science but I can say that my son's mood is much happier if he's wearing it while teething. He also adored frozen blueberries when he was a little bigger than Mila. I completely agree that teeth are disgusting.
I have a teething baby too! I'd just be careful with that teething oil. I see that it contains peppermint oil, which is not recommended for use on babies or children under 6.