I Have Been Outdone

I mentioned that I bought a new car back a while back, a fact which should be more exciting than it is. It boiled down to I had over 100,000 miles on my previous one (thus, maintenance and repair $$$$$) and it was forever trashed because CHILDREN ARE THE WORST. So, fresh start? Or something?

It really wasn't that exciting because even though I was like I WILL TRY SOMETHING NEW! I bought another Rogue. Apparently that's all I buy? This is my fourth one, so whatever. It was the purse compartment that did it, if we're being honest. And I am. I tried to love other cars, but they didn't have a little spot for a purse so they sucked.

ANYWAY.

Nissan Rogue. I bought the good one because I'm a big girl with a big girl job and I basically live in my car. I have earned the right to have the good one.This is important because the good one comes with a lot of extra data-rich features. For example, when the tire pressure is low, I get an alert on the Nissan app on my phone. Cool, right? It's added to the on-dash VERY CLEAR warning that the tire pressure is low. Oh, and an email.

So, yeah, that's pointless? I don't actually need to be told in three different places that the tire pressure is low. I can figure it out from the dash. It's all good.

Oh, and did I mention that all of the alerts/emails are generated EVERY SINGLE TIME the car is started? Because they are. Imagine running errands on the first super cold day in a long time and how many alerts I got. I got double the number you're thinking because it was SUPER cold and I had to stop at like 20 places.

To make it better, Mila was with me.

Mila is finally embracing being a reader in a giant world of words. It's pretty great, though it would have been better if she had done it a year earlier, but whatever. Her most favorite thing to read right now is the dash of my car.

"Low tire pressure. Mom, did you know the tire pressure is low?"

"What does it mean that the tire pressure is low?"

"It has a triangle with an exclamation point. I think that means it's important."

"Mom, I think you should put air in the tires now."

"Mom, the tire pressure is still low. You should fix it."

"MOM, YOU NEED TO PUT AIR IN THE TIRES."

Mila went on and on and on, issuing constant warnings about a thing that I could plainly see for myself on the dash and also was getting emails and app notifications and OMG IT'S JUST COLD THIS IS NOT AN EMERGENCY OMG.

Normally that sort of thing would take me a few days to get around to since, you know, STILL NOT AN EMERGENCY. This time it took me a little over an hour.

Basically, Nissan should hire Mila to replace all of their alerts and emails because she can nag someone into fixing a thing faster than anyone else ever in the history of the world.

Which is how it came to be that I, the Queen of Gas Tank Roulette, now fills up ten seconds after the low fuel light comes on. I could go another 70 miles, but only if I wanted to freaking lose my mind because Mila. Mila is the queen nagger.