Lesson O'Learned.
"I don't like St. Patrick's Day," Alexis said. We were walking through the Gap Outlet in search of some new jeans for she who suddenly decided to not fit into any of her clothes.
"Why not?" I asked as I held up a green t-shirt. "You get to wear fun green clothes like this for St. Patrick's Day."
"I don't want to wear green," she replied. "I don't like green."
"But you have to wear green on St. Patrick's Day," I warned the oblivious short person.
"Why?" she asked.
I spent the next several minutes explaining the whole pinch thing. As Alexis listened, her face scrunched up in disapproval. She processed my words for a moment, and then began to cry. "I don't like St. Patrick's Day," she wailed.
Every day since that fateful moment, Alexis has sprung out of bed with a worried look on her face. "Is it St. Patrick's Day today?" she asked each time. When I finally replied in the affirmative this morning, absolute panic washed over her face. "Where's my green shirt?" she wailed as she flew down the hall to her closet.
Never before has the child managed to get dressed so quickly. Usually getting her to put on her clothes in the morning is a Herculean effort, requiring reminder after reminder and nudge after nudge. In a matter of moments, she proudly came strutting back into the bathroom where I stood blow-drying my hair.
"Look! I'm ready for St. Patrick's Day!" she declared with a proud grin on her face. As I complimented her Hungry Hungry Caterpillar shirt, she paused, a serious expression falling over her eyes. "Momma," she said, "You're not wearing green."
"You're right," I replied. "I'm not."
In a flash, a mischievous grin overtook her face as she reached out and stabbed me with her pointy, chubby little fingers. I suppose it may have been a pinch, but it seemed a lot more like getting poked with a spork. Also? IT HURT.
Remind me to wear green next year for St. Patrick's Day. It's for my own safety.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Reader Comments (17)
Tiny toddler fingers, that's all I've got to say. Hell of a pinch.
Pinch thing? What is this pinch thing you speak of? I have never heard tell of a pinch thing in conjunction with St. Patrick's Day.
toddler elbows are also very pointy and sharp and hurt a LOT too.
Someone should instruct the little one of the dangers of biting the hand that feeds (and clothes) her. Mamas should be immune from the St Patty's Pinch.
Bwahahaha! Green underwear, mom. Always our fallback.
My advice? Don't mess with that kid. The look on her face? She means business :)
Clearly, you weren't panicked enough. But! I bet when the black and blue fades, there will be a nice green bruise to carry you through the rest of the day. :)
I love that picture. Was she channeling Kate?
I, too, am utterly unfamiliar with this pinch thing for St. Patrick's Day. And I'm Irish. I think I'll stick with teaching my girls about shamrocks and leprecauns, and leave it at that.
Until they are 21 and I can tell them about Guiness, of course.
You opened yourself up for that one!
LOVE that picture of her!
How have y'all not heard of getting pinched if you don't wear green on St. Patrick's Day? I'm mystified. If you don't wear green, the leprechauns will get you! (I left that part out when I explained it all to Alexis because I didn't really want to create a new phobia. Furries is enough, thank you very much.)
I never knew of the pinch thing until Twitter educated me yesterday.
My MIL instilled the orange for protestants and green for catholics in her children. So my husband has always worn orange and then spends the day explaining it when people try to pinch him. I think he just likes to be difficult.
adorable! you should totally create a horror for at least one day a week- so speedy dressing is inspired. ;)
That is one serious 'game face.' Alexis was definitely paying attention to the green-wearing rules. That's good to know for future lessons.
Leprechauns aren't immune to horrors on St. Patrick's Day either. You'll have to ask me about The Leprechaun story someday. It'll keep you in stitches the rest of your living days.
So why weren't you wearing green, Momma? ;)
Sounds like you need to tell her she has to wear a certain color everyday so that she'll get dressed more easily! HA!
It's really dangerous to turn loose kids with free reign to pinch at will. They seem to enjoy it a little too much.