Never Ask Dr. Google Anything
It started out completely innocently. I had turned to Dr. Google to try to find something for work, but as often happens, a wormhole opened up and sucked me into the Land of Random. A click here, a search there, a few more clicky clicks and there it was. I found myself looking at a list of symptoms of Bipolar Disorder in children.
As I glanced at the list, I started to place a mental checkmark next to the things that applied to Alexis. Check. Check. Check. And . . . check. And . . OMG . . . check check check.
There was a whole lot of checks.
For a split second, I felt the raw edges of worry begin to seep into my brain. What if? Should I? Do I? Is she?
And then I took another look at the list.
Oppositional behavior. Yup, the kid has been known to do a few things I've told her not to do.
Frequent mood swings. OMG, yes. Alexis is the queen of Giggles Turned to Tears. I mean, it's all fun and games until the Bulldog looks at you wrong.
Silliness, goofiness, giddiness. Ding! Ding! Ding! The kid can't be serious for more than ten seconds at a time.
Restlessness, fidgetiness. Well, yeah, getting Alexis to sit still generally requires duct tape and bricks.
Grandiosity. Hmmm . . . yeah, if you ask Alexis to describe something, she usually exaggerate it a bit.
Impulsivity. Sure. I mean, Alexis has been known to blurt out things like, "Boys can't have ponytails!" after seeing a REALLY big guy who looked like he had just hopped off his Harley.
Distractibility. Oh, hell yes. All it takes is something sparkly or shiny or Jonas and the kid is all "Huh? What's the what?"
Hyperactivity. I imagine bouncing off the walls counts? If so, YES. YES. YES. Alexis is bouncier than a rubber ball on speed.
Thanks to Dr. Google, I now realize Alexis has Bipolar Disorder. Either that, or she's a COMPLETELY NORMAL FOUR-YEAR OLD.
Stupid Dr. Google.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Reader Comments (18)
Heh. Yeah. I know. I do. 100%.
There is a reason they don't diagnose kids with mental health disorders until they are older. All 3, 4, and 5 year olds completely fit all of the symptoms. I've had to remind myself not to worry about OCD with Sabrina because she is 4 and 4, by definition, is crazy!
This made me chuckle. I think every mom has done this exact thing at least once!
I'd like to know where Dr. Google acquired his (her?) MD because after my visits, I'm always in a worse place than before our consultation.
I'm cracking up - you have no idea how many times I secretly thought about Em, "OMG - is there something wrong with her?!?" I feel better knowing that I am not the only one.
I've been through those moments..Its scary how we can get carried away. Every time I do that..I resolve to just enjoy my kids and let them be kids. :-)
haha um yeah. That explains every 3 and 4 year old kid IN THE WORLD.
Nice job. This is all so true. Since I have 6 years of experience I can tell you that unless all of this stops your child from contributing to life in a normal fashion or it all becomes a safety issue then yep they are truly just kids being kids. I'm not as lucky with Boy Child but Diva she was and is very much drama and distraction like all little girls should be. Enjoy the fun of it!
Well thank you for this. I was seriously considering having Dylan checked for ADHD, because he cannot be still for 2 seconds. I will now keep repeating to myself, "All four year olds are crazy".
Ain't it the truth. I just read an article about how very young children are being incorrectly diagnosed with ADHD. My response? Duh. That should be in the checklist: Acts like a typical four-year-old? Check!
I was check check checking all the symptoms as I read for my 3 year old boy! Ahh...the preschool years :)
So, I gather from your research that I am really just a four year old in a forty-three year old body? Way cool! :D
Oppositional (aka stubborn), tendency to exaggerate, distracted by shiny things...I was ready to diagnose her as Southern!
It's the little kids who are NOT like that who I worry about! Especially the silent ones who stare at you creepily while standing with their twins in a cornfield.
Alexis and C.ooper are two peas in a pod! Were he to be given that assessment, he would nail each and every one of those things in the span of time it would take the adminstrator to find a pen. We walk a fine line between exhaustion and exhiliration on most days, but I know they are short-lived . . . it won't be long before he is a mopey teenager!
yours too, huh?
:-)
After Bug actually WAS diagnosed with the "personality quirks" that he has been, I thought to do some extra research....
Apparently, I've given birth to a medical miracle. He has more disorders than any child currently living.
It's a very good thing that I am sooo amazingly adept at ignoring everything life and it's experts try to tell him. I'm able to set the most awesome example of just ignoring it all until you have convinced everyone around you to believe what you believe. ;)
(Obviously, knowing our amazing child and his quirks, we realize that some things just refuse to be ignored. We've got an awesome doctor....who helps ensure that he is able to act just like any other "normal" 12yr old.)
I looked up bipolar issues in kids one day after my oldest laughed so hard he nearly peed WHILE STILL WIPING TEARS FROM HIS EYES FROM A PREVIOUS HISSY FIT. I was nearing the same conclusions...spazzing out about "OMG what kind of medicines do they prescribe for that?!?" when I caught a show on Discovery Health or some such crap about kids who are bipolar. After watching that? DANG MY KID IS NORMAL!