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Tuesday
Oct232018

New Life Strategy

Because I'm destined to live in Confusedlandia, Mila is suddenly scared of things. She's made it through the first four years and four months of her life completely unafraid of everything, but now? Don't look at her wrong. She gets scared.

Except, not of things that make sense.

The kid loves scary movies. A lot. She's been watching Gnome Alone on Netflix on repeat lately and while it is definitely a kids' movie, I'd say it's more meant for 6-8 year olds. It's not TERRIBLE, but it's not sunshine and rainbows either. It happens to fall into the genre of "Halloween movies" which Mila has been completely dedicated to lately.

Mila watched The Goonies all the way through without freaking out before Alexis did. So.

Mila is also not at all scared of rides, as in there is no amusement park ride that's too big for her. It's almost a good thing she's tiny for her age because I think she would have worn high heels to Kennywood so she could get on the Black Widow if she thought she had any chance of getting away with it.

She's also not afraid of heights (watch out for falling Milas, y'all), telling me off, or the 12-foot tall inflatable witch in our front yard. Actually, she likes all Halloween decorations. She doesn't care if they're scary or gory or whatever. HALLOWEEN IS THE BEST.

That love of Halloween made me think the kid would be game to go through the little Haunted House at a little community-type thing. It was built for small kids, so it was suuuuuper tame and cutesy. There were a few scarecrows and skeletons, but legit I have scarier things hanging out in my fridge than were in that haunted house.

Of course, Mila was petrified and refused to go in. OF COURSE. Because I thought she would like it if we just got past the entrance, I pushed the issue a little.

That was a bad idea.

As we inched our way inside, with Mila fighting me with every bit of her might, a skeleton walked up to us and said, "Hello!" Like I said, it was more of a cutesy haunted house.

Mila turned to the skeleton, scowled, and then screamed, "YOU CAN'T BE MY FRIEND GO AWAY."

I've decided to adopt that strategy right there. I'm going to scream, "YOU CAN'T BE MY FRIEND GO AWAY" at every person I encounter for the next several weeks. It's going to be great!

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