Oh, Mila

I've been at this parenting thing long enough to know behavioral challenges are cyclical, so it's just a matter of time before both girls return to being rational human beings, but for now? OMG.

OMG.

I'm ready to duct tape them both to the ceiling and throw pencils at them to see how many will stick.

Alexis is a super special sort of challenging right now, which whatever. She's still the kid I can glare at and she will go clean the kitchen while apologizing profusely for being a jerk. It won't stop her from being a jerk again, but at least she's remorseful and seems to get it when she screws up.

AND THEN THERE'S MILA.

There's a long -very long- string of sins that Mila has committed recently, but perhaps my favorite is that she cut her hair. Again. She was outside helping me in the garden, ran inside to go the bathroom, and got lost along the way? And scissors magically appeared in her hands? You know, the scissors that were up two extra flights of stairs she didn't need to climb? And that were tucked up out of her reach, meaning SHE CLIMBED ON THE COUNTER TO GET THEM. I mean, whatever. These things happen. I accidentally cut my hair all of the time. Whoops!

An extra special twist is that she basically gave herself bangs, which means she cut off a solid 8-10" from the front. She tucked those big chunks of very long hair under the cabinet, in that little recess that is at the bottom of every cabinet. I would never have noticed! So clever.

Ahem.

So Mila gave herself bangs, but remember, this is not the first time Mila has "accidentally" cut her hair. The last time she did it, hellfire reigned down on her little world. You would think that would be enough to prevent a recurrence, but APPARENTLY NOT. Anyway, hellfire is reigning down again because I don't know what else to do to get the kid to care about following basic rules like STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM THE SCISSORS.

But, to quote Mila, "It will grow back!" so the hellfire probably isn't going to do a dang thing. I might add some brimstone to the mania, but even that is questionable because GET THIS.

JUST GET THIS.

As Mila was raging at me because how dare I be mad at her for breaking the rules, she tried to negotiate. She threw out a, "If you buy me a toy at Target, I won't ever cut my hair again."

I politely declined that generous offer. When I declined it, Mila -completely- lost her temper. She started yelling at me and doing all sorts of things that will cause her to never see a Kindle or TV remote ever again, but who is keeping score? Oh, wait, I am. I am keeping score. I'm also struggling not to find the funny in the whole thing because the other thing the kid said was, "I offered you a deal and you had your chance to keep me from ever cutting my hair again but you didn't take it so whatever happens is YOUR FAULT."

LET THE RECORD SHOW, IT WILL NOT BE MY FAULT. We're going to spend the week learning that particular lesson.

Comments

[Lisa]

Fun fact, that recess at the bottom of every cabinet is called a "toe kick" or "kick space", so your toes have somewhere to go when you're standing at the cabinet. (I learned this when I tried to talk to someone about making a cabinet lower by cutting that little bottom part off and they let me know in no uncertain terms how unacceptable my plan was because THE TOES! THEY MUST HAVE THEIR SPACE!)

[Karl]

it's funny (well, not really) how some kids just naturally try gaslighting as a way to get out of trouble. I can attest that allowing it to succeed can have very serious long-term effects! I hope that the education takes and doesn't have to be repeated too often.