Please Send Drugs
When do kids start feeling pressure to be like the people around them? I'm not sure, but I do know that Alexis is already there.
She wants straight hair because she wants to have hair like mine.
She wants to go to Build-A-Bear constantly because her friends get to go all the time. Or, so they claim. My money says this whole Build-A-Bear thing with the preschoolers is like alcohol with teenagers. You know, where "I drank SO much beer" actually means, "I had a sip." I bet Evie has managed to go to Build-A-Bear once total. She's just telling the other kids she goes every week so that she looks cool.
Alexis wants to dress like the girls on High School Musical. Except Sharpay. She doesn't want to dress like Sharpay because Sharpay is too mean. (Parenting win right there!)
Alexis walks around with a little Green Monster on her shoulder. He's constantly telling her to be jealous of everybody and everything.
She's even jealous that some of her friends have allergies.
I've tried to explain to her that it's stupid to want something that sucks. She isn't buying what I'm selling. To her, the friends that have allergies get to have special foods at lunch. They get to go to the doctor all the time (she's a dork and still thinks the doctor's office is all fun and games). Most of all, the friends who have allergies get special treatment.
Who doesn't want special treatment?
As we were sitting out on the patio one evening, Alexis was carrying on and generally being a complete nutjob. She knew she had managed to fray all of my nerves except one, and she was PROUD. With a grin on her face and a twinkle in her eye, she was playing that last nerve like a fiddle. She was talking and talking and talking and jibbering and jabbering and generally making me miss the days when she hadn't learned to talk yet. Those were the glory days!
As she continued to wear on that nerve, I started to give her That Look. You know, That Look that moms do when they're daydreaming about duct-taping your mouth shut. Alexis knows That Look very well. She sees it often enough that she doesn't even have to ask. She KNOWS I'm thinking she should try being quiet for a moment or two or ten.
"Momma," she finally said. "I'm sorry, but I'm allergic to not talking."
Anybody know who I have to talk to so that she can get treatment for that allergy? Please?
Monday, May 30, 2011
Reader Comments (11)
duct tape really is the only thing for that allergy.
My Maybelline always wanted braces as a kid. Try as I might, I never could convince her braves weren't all fun and games. She was so excited to finally get braces at twelve! Right up to the moment the put the braces on.
It's normal, Mama, those wants.
Heh. Sabrina and Alexis would either get along famously (Sabrina never stops talking) or dislike each other intensely due to not being able to get a word in. But they can't ever meet. My kids still don't know that Build a bear exists. I'm not wanting to spill those particular beans until guilt eats away at my soul to the point that I have to do a big huge thing to feel better.
Tell her that kids with allergies have to get shots every week.
My brother and I dreaded our allergy shots.
LOL @ allergic to NOT talking! Love that!
Funny! Dylan needs the same medication.
I wanted braces when I was a kid. REALLY bad - because back then the only folks who got braces were those who could afford them and we...couldn't. I saw it as a status symbol I guess.
Maybe Evie gets to go to build-a-bear and pick out a new outfit for her bear on a regular basis? I could see spending a few bucks for a new accessory in exchange for a relatively well-behaved trip to the mall. Just sayin'.
@calliope--She still thinks shots are fun. They come with a pretzel at her pediatrician's office, and apparently that little pinch is worth it for a pretzel. She's not right in the head, I know.
My coworker wanted to know why I was laughing so hard. Now she's laughing, too.
I think that's normal, but I don't know when it starts. I'm not looking forward to it at all.
This is all so familiar. For a while if she didn't want to eat something she would say that she was allergic to it. She signs her name Juliana D, because she wants to have the same last name as her best friend. At some point I hope they out grow the non-stop talking. I fear Kindergarten will curb her daytime talking and leave her with even more words for after school.
Alex is already looking to other kids, and he's 2 1/4 today. I saw it over the weekend at Waldameer when he was riding the mini frog hopper. He would look to see if the other kids were having fun, then he'd laugh along with them.
He does that too in restaurants. We were once seated near a rambunctious laughing group of older people, and Alex would laugh along with them - he had no reason why, he just was following along. They thought it was funny, and would laugh even more, which would make Alex laugh even more, which got other people annoyed, but *I* didn't start it :-).
good lord if you find one, send it my way. My boy is only quiet when he's unconscious. Sometimes he just makes noise. just random noise for no reason. Sigh.