The Beginning of the End of Elementary School
I think there is a law or something that says I *have* to post this.
FIFTH. GRADE.
I didn't have anything to say about that (just lots of sobbing and incoherent rambling, if we're being honest), but then I went and looked at the first day of school posts from other years. I got stuck on one in particular. First grade, man.
The photo was enough to make my heart grow 18 sizes, but then I went and read the post.
Dear Alexis,
By the time you read this, you'll already know this fun little fact, but I'll share it here just in case. I lose sleep over major decisions, struggling with them and weighing my options and thinking entirely too hard about them. But, once the decision is made, I let it go. I forgive myself if things don't go the way I had hoped. I do it because I believe that if I've given a decision all of my heart when making it, I owe it to myself to find my happy in the consequences.
I wasn't able to do that last year when it came to the decision about where you should go to school.
I second-guessed myself and regretted things and considered changing paths and generally continued to struggle long past the moment I first dropped you off in that lunchroom just over a year ago.
I have a feeling this year is going to be more of the same. We've changed course and moved you to a new school. I'm not sure how it will end. I'm working towards finding peace with it because IT'S DONE. I have no time machine to go back and change it. Letting go is hard, though.
Really hard.
It took me until that moment when your bus pulled away from the curb this morning to figure out why I'm still toiling over the decision. It's because you've reached an age where it's up to you.
You have to find your happy.
I may pick your school, but how you interact with teachers and classmates and your school work is 100% you. I can guide you, encourage you, and try to help you along the field of life when need be, but you have to do it on your own.
All I can do is pick the school and then yell encouraging words from the sidelines.
It's really a very minor decision to pick your school. But, really, it's one of the few I still have.
So, my dear, grab hold of this fresh start as tight as you can. Squeeze every last bit of happiness out of it, give it everything you've got, and I'll be right over here cheering you on.
Love,
The Lady Who Was Super Grateful That You Still Wanted Me To Walk You To The Bus Stop
I can sum up how that all worked out with one little quote Alexis delivered to me earlier today.
"The hallway is my runway and the classroom is my after party."
Mission accomplished.
Wednesday, August 31, 2016
Reader Comments (2)
Beautiful summary and encouragement for me as someone in those same shoes now five years later. Our daughter is in K this year, she started the year at a school that wasn't my preference but was pretty much our only option. Three days in, we get a call that a spot opened up at my first choice. We immediately switched schools because this meant a better schooling experience all the way through middle school and the added bonus of a guaranteed spot for little brother down the road. She, however, was less than thrilled and complained all weekend about not wanting to switch schools. Come Monday morning when I delivered her to the new school she walked confidently in, kissed me goodbye, and happily ran into her class. What a difference! I cried tears of joy and relief knowing she would be OK without me and that we had indeed made the best decision for her, after all.
Who is that young woman and where's the tiny squishy child who existed when I first started reading this blog. It's been a pleasure watching Alexis grow and change, she seems so wonderful. BUT ALSO THE PASSAGE OF TIME WHAT?