The Special People Need to be Reminded to Shut Up
They were there to see Mary. I know that because they said so. "Is Mary in this one?" "Is Mary coming up soon?" "Does Mary dance soon?" and on and on.
And on and on.
AND ON AND ON.
The nonstop chatter moved from Mary to retirement to walking dogs and back again. It meandered down a path of mayoral election debates followed by a pro Tea Party rant. There was talk of appropriate attire for walking the dog, how great Netflix is, and plenty of words that would make anyone look around and ask, "Did I seriously just hear that?"
You know how sometimes you stumble upon a Facebook update and you're like, "Why the hell did you put those words where others could see them?" THAT. EXACTLY THAT. All those things that make you flinch were said.
Every last one of them.
Out loud.
DURING the dance recital.
It's really very fortunate that the fates lined Alexis' performances up towards the end of the nearly four-hour long recital. The first half wasn't the time for paying attention because CLEARLY it wasn't the time for paying attention. They said so. With all of their words that were about everything and nothing, the two older women who were seated behind us at the recital made it well known that the show wasn't for watching. Rather, the loud music was a nuisance that they had to raise their voices to cover. They chatted and chatted and chatted.
I glared.
The didn't flinch.
I glared again.
Nothing.
I threw more dirty looks over my shoulder than would seem possible, but they just kept on talking.
Frustration mounted. I couldn't understand how they weren't shutting up and began to consider ways to force it to happen. One of the women had a cane, so I thought about ways it could be used to put an end to the talking. Then I considered how we all seem to think teens are so very rude these days, but no. NO. It's the older generation that thinks it's OK to go to a dance recital and talk loudly through the entire thing.
Only, they didn't.
Because at the intermission, I said something. I don't really know what exactly I said because I was flustered and annoyed and trying very hard not to say things that rhyme with duck as I told them to shut up.
Which, really? Why is it that *I* felt bad about even considering asking them to stop talking? Why do we do that? I can't possibly be the only person who falters doing something reasonable in the wake of something so very rude.
But, hey. I said something and the talking stopped. Apparently there are people who have to be told specifically that their behavior is rude. Once you tell them, they stop it.
Just like that.
Thank goodness. If it had gone on much longer, that cane would have been in big trouble.
Tuesday, May 21, 2013
Reader Comments (15)
The knees. The bruises. The smile.
I adore that child.
(some people need the cane :-} )
I have felt your pain many, many times. Good job using your words instead of the cane. ;)
Good for you...good for you!
I dont know! But I have the same damn internal debate every time I'm in that situation. For some reason I worry for a second about being rude to people that are CLEARLY more rude than I could be pointing out their rudeness. For some odd reason it always takes me a second to squelch the "oh I don't want these people that I am resisting the urge to cause physical harm to to think that I'm a jerk..." thing that creeps up. Fortunately there is also an indignant 8 year old in my head that pokes the worrier and says "hey! Those jerks asked for it!" and I go about my business :)
Glad you told them, at least you did enjoy the second half of the performance.
Glad you told them, at least you did enjoy the second half of the performance.
This, thank you! Frankly, I'm tired of the "entitlement factor" - people who think courtesy does not apply to them (for whatever reason). Young and older adults are so fast to past judgement on children, or their parents, yet, they don't see their own rude, loud, obnoxious behaviors. If you want to talk, go stand in the back or better still, don't come. Good for you for standing up to "these people". I'm super, super impressed with your skills!
Good for you! Some people need a gentle reminder of how to behave in public. And words are much better than a cane! lol Alexis is BEAUTIFUL!
Isn't it funny that we have to struggle to find the right words to prevent offending someone who clearing doesn't afford you the same courtesy? I'm so glad you said something. So many times, I am left kicking myself that I didn't stand up for myself or someone around me for fear of appearing rude to someone else who doesn't deserve my manners.
I'm glad you said something. Few things irk me more when people don't speak up against rudeness,but I stead complain constantly. When you have a chance to do something in a way like that which presented itself, I believe you should. Well done. I have.a good friend who co shanty complains about the bartender at my old bar in Harrisburg. When I ask if she has ever raised it with the owner or even the bartender, I alway get a "no". How is someone supposed to address a problem of the person in the position to do so isn't being told there's a problem?
Good for you. I silently seethed all through a tball game this evening. I want to be like you when I grow up.
I experienced this more often than I can count at dance performances and school programs. My daughter had an end of the year music program at school last night and a family near us talked loudly through the entire thing. I witnessed more than one person near them shush them and give them looks, yet they continued to gab. It was so distracting and really ruined the concert for me and they weren't even right next to me, I can only imagine how the people near them felt. And I think people thing talking is ok at dance performances because they are watching dance and not listening to singing or speaking. Never occurs to them that most people want to watch and listen and enjoy without having to listening to people chit chat,
Good for you! Audience chatter is a big peeve of mine. It's especially bad when kids are being announced to receive an award/certificate. If you're kid is near the end of the list, by the time s/he is announced no one is paying any attentions anymore. It's just so disrespectful!
That blue costume is sweeeet!
wish i could have been there! really wanted to see alexis perform on stage. and i certainly would have told those women to stop ruining everyone else's time. glad you braved the confrontation. xoxo
Good for you!! Sometimes we are so busy advocating for our kiddos that we forget to advocate for ourselves! I'm sure alllll the other attendees said a silent thank you, too!