When Breastfeeding and Work Don't Work
This post is part of BlogHer's Women@Work editorial series, made possible by AFL-CIO.
Right from the start, Alexis was a breastfed baby. I was home with her for essentially the first six months of her life. While I sometimes wanted to use her head as a hockey puck in those early days when latching felt like an alligator clamping down, we really didn't have any major problems. She never had a single drop of formula and I was able to build up a decent stockpile of frozen liquid gold. Then I started working. Along with that, of course, came the need to pump at least twice per day.
That topic was one that I had discussed with my future boss when I interviewed, so I wasn't really expecting to have any problems with it. I was very, VERY wrong. At first, I was told that I could just use a vacant office for those two brief disappearing acts of pumping.
Then, midway through my first week, I learned that the office was slated to get an occupant. My supervisor didn't have any ideas for alternatives, so I e-mailed the Human Resources Department. Nothing. So I e-mailed again, this time copying the HR Representatives supervisor. I got an answer quick, but it basically said, "Use a restroom or reserve a conference room. The end."
Now, I don't know about you, but I'm not game for making my food in a bathroom, so I wasn't really game for making my kid's food there. Besides the fact that it's a gross idea to me (I compare it to taking the Foreman grill in there and cooking up a hamburger. Would you do it?), it was a logistical impossibility. The restroom housed two stalls, neither of which had an outlet for my pump. The only outlet happened to be right by the door. Silly me, I've never had aspirations of putting on a peep show complete with wondrous sound effects.
So, the bathroom wasn't happening. The conference room idea was just plain dumb, given that there is a major shortage of them in that particular building, so they are impossible to get. Oh, and there's the small manner of most of them having windows looking out into the hall and none of them having working locks on the doors. Again with the discreet issue.
Maybe now would be a good time to mention that my former employer was a very large hospital system -- as in one of the twelve largest in the nation. It also happens to be one of the most profitable. There are more than 45,000 employees, including over 4,000 physicians. That particular non-profit organization reported net profits of well over $200 million in 2012. I worked in the corporate headquarters, just a few stories down from one of the best paid CEO's of a non-profit in the nation. Anybody else see a wee bit of a problem with the lack of appropriate accommodations?
Anyway, when it became clear that the Human Resources Department was full of non-compassionate robots, I devised a plan. I would go down to my SUV twice a day, every day, and sit in the back seat and pump. It was an underground parking garage, so it was relatively dark, and my tinted windows afforded me a small amount of privacy. Of course, I can tell you that at least four people saw things they probably wish they hadn't, but it was a livable option.
Then I was told I needed to move over to a different building. It made a fair amount of business sense, but the new building was a warehouse, with even less in the way of accommodations, and no parking garage. The only viable answer was still the car, but this time there was an outdoor lot complete with LOTS of traffic. Obviously I couldn't just sit in the parking lot with my boobies hanging out and various machinery hooked up, so I went cruising for options. I ended up finding a car wash where I could park my SUV in a stall and only have potential traffic on one side of me. So that's what I did, every day, twice a day, for months -- four months, in fact.
The lack of accommodations severely hindered my ability to be efficient in my breaks, I was less productive at work, and I was constantly stressed. Trying to maintain a professional schedule and needing to drive ten minutes just to pump milk really put a strain on me. I skipped lunch to make up for the lost time, I pumped in the morning before leaving for work, I pumped in the evening after work, and I nearly always brought work home with me in a feeble attempt to balance it all. I can tell you that many important people at the giant hospital system were aware, and not a single one actually gave a crap. Not a one made any attempts to make some sort of accommodation. In fact, when Alexis was nine-months old, a high-level manager told me, "Isn't your daughter almost a year old? It's time for her to quit getting breast milk anyway."
WELL THEN.
*smoke comes out of ears*
*deep breaths*
*more deep breaths*
OK. ANYHOO, Alexis and I made it to 13 months. She never once drank a single drop of formula, and overall, I'd say we had a very positive experience. Our only real challenge was making sure she had ample supply while I was at work. THAT was a significant struggle every.single.day. Looking back, I have no idea how we made it, other than to take it one day at a time. It sure wasn't with the help of one of the nation's leading health care systems.
This post is part of BlogHer's Women@Work editorial series, made possible by AFL-CIO.
Friday, August 9, 2013
Reader Comments (10)
Wow! Pumping sucks as it is - it just isn't fun, even when you have the most perfect circumstances. I am totally impressed with your diligence! But totally unimpressed with your employer! So very uncool.
I was pretty fortunate with pumping at work because most of my co-workers were moms and one was even pumping at the same time. Also my work has lactation stations, but I found that I didn't need to go to them, I had plenty of office space available to pump away, even with the loud whirring. My body didn't work with me though, so I ended before I wanted to. But if your work isn't accommodating, then, ugh, what an unnecessary battle.
Yes, I can confirm that UPMC has horrendous pumping accommodations. I had an awful experience (many similar to yours). I became incredibly stressed, unproductive at work, and due to the lack of reasonable accommodations, I couldn't keep up with the necessary pumping schedule and I stopped producing enough milk. The level of guilt I felt switching to formula a little before a year was unbearable and my heart broke. Your blog brought back the rage I continue to feel for my employer. But I appreciate you bringing this to light.
Ugh! I feel your pain. My former employer provided NO accommodations whatsoever when I wanted to pump. (Granted...I worked for an agricultural company with 8 guys in a field and my options were as follows: A} Tiny glass box while driving machine or B} tiny glass box while not driving machine.} I was completely unable to pump at all and felt such guilt over the whole ordeal even though it wasn't really my fault.
When my daughter was young (15 years ago!) I had a very supportive boss, but in a very unaccommodating building (100+ years old, stuffed to gills with people and offices, not much extra space). I ended up using a small, private bathroom on the top floor. I thought it was fine at the time, but realized later that it probably contributed to my issue with recurring breast infections! I still work in the same building, but I now make it my goal to find a spot (NOT the little bathroom!!!) for my breastfeeding coworkers to pump. It sometimes changes, because of personnel and office changes in the building, but we're always able to find a space. Just a note: during the time when I was pumping in the bathroom, I remember going to a work-related meeting in one of the PNC buildings in Downtown. As I walked to the conference room, I passed a room labeled "lactation room." I looked in and saw a lovely room with recliners, outlets, and separate stands for pumps. I nearly burst into tears. ALL employers should have this!
I had issues with breastfeeding from the start, that I won't get into. But, I remember when a co-worker wanted to pump. We work in an environment where cleanliness is a big problem (it's a kids' facility and they're just gross most of the time). She came into my office to pump. Often times I was still in there, but my back was to her so she had her privacy. I wouldn't have been bothered either way, but still. She could continue to work on the computer, do her thing and had tons of privacy. Our facility isn't in a position to offer a dedicated room, but I cannot believe some place like UPMC wouldn't do that!! I don't know the law, but is it illegal not to offer some place other than a bathroom???
The fact that this happens at any large employer anymore is hard to believe. The fact that this happened at a HEALTHCARE facility is absolutely ludicrous.
I also can't believe that at such a large employer you were the first nursing mother to approach the subject. So, what? HR just repeatedly ignored the needs of new moms? No one there said "hey, we've had several people bring this up, maybe we should solve this issue"?
My employer may not be perfect, but I've been at this facility for over 8 years, and since the day I started, long before I was even pregnant, I was made aware that a private nursing room was available (with a locking door! gasp!). And I work in manufacturing. Not HEALTHCARE. I am still shaking my head at that. Ugh.
i am amazed that you were subjected to such terrible treatment from them. or from any employer. i have a pregnant coworker now that i will ensure has plenty of privacy for anything she wants to do. thanks for sharing your story.
I am so saddened to hear that it is still such a struggle to find a private place to pump breastmilk. I, too, had no option but to use the ladies room, however the only marginally acceptable part was that there was a small anteroom (so I didn't have to sit in a stall) with a plug. There was no privacy, however, and anyone who entered the room would be able to see me. I asked to use a vacant office (there were more than one) and was bluntly told "no", and when I questioned why, was told that because I was not an executive level employee (just a secretary), I was not allowed. My boss (a woman!) would complain that I had to take 2 breaks a day to pump, and on more than one occasion I was told by her to "forget about your baby when you walk in that door". Really? I was doing my work, and then some, because when I was on maternity leave my employer had downsized our department and acquired 2 more banks. The abuse from my boss coupled with a serious case of postpartum depression, and I ended up having a breakdown and was suicidal. During my time in the hospital, I had to let my milk dry up, which added to my feelings of failure as a new mom. That was 17 years ago. I hope that the beautiful lactation room at First Side Center might have been, even the tiniest bit, because of what I had to go through. Because my employer was the real estate and property management department at PNC. No mother should ever have to forget about her child when she is at work, and no mother should have to pump her baby's meals in a bathroom. Ever.
Stories like these make me so mad! People are just jerks about this! Who are they to say forget about your baby or insinuate that it's time to stop BFing because your baby is nearly a year??? I am so glad you women have stood your ground and continued to do what is best for your baby and I am so sad for those who felt they could not or were forced into making a decision to stop when they didn't want to. It should not be this way. BFing is just as important to a baby's health as good prenatal care and no one would dare tell you not to go to your doc appt. while pregnant because it was taking time away from work. Things to need to change and I hope they do soon. UPMC is dispicable!