Still the Baby

I am going to COMPLETELY ignore that thing where a tiny infant is suddenly a sophomore in high school and instead question HOW THE HELL DID THIS HAPPEN?

Second grade, y'all. SECOND GRADE.

I'm not sure who decided to let babies into second grade, but here we are. I think maybe this is extra stunning because 2020 just plain didn't exist. Right? We all agree on that fact, don't we? 2020 shall be eliminated from the history books because it wasn't worth the ink it would take to write about. So that means first grade wasn't a real thing, which turns into my kindergartener jumped straight to second grade.

That's the only possible explanation.

So far, Mila is over the moon with excitement about returning to school. While cyber school went -really- well during that year that didn't exist, she is back at a brick and mortar. It is still to be determined if that was a terrible decision, but it was based on the fact that school administration mostly has their act together.

Many of the parents in our district, on the other hand, are out of their freaking minds. There are numerous groups gaining traction in an attempt to declare their child's freedom to not wear a mask and ... spread a potentially deadly virus to the entire community.

I don't get it.

And don't even try to explain the whole thing to that happy little second grader up in that photo. She has HAD IT with people not understanding that wearing a mask is no big deal. In fact, she has officially crossed over into being a person who plans her outfits around her carefully selected mask because she wants to match from head to toe.

Just like a tiny baby would. Ahem.

Welp

What a Rebel

There are two really important facts about Alexis:

1. She is allergic to breaking the rules.
2. She constantly drowns in thoughts about consequences.

Does that make her the easiest-to-parent teenager ever? Yes, yes it does. Before you hate me for having the world's easiest-to-parent kid, I should probably remind you that Mila is the exact opposite of those things. I will get what's coming to me. In the meantime, let me just tell you a little story about what happens when those two facts collide with a little good ol' fashion teenage rebellion.

Alexis sucks at teenage rebellion, for what it's worth. She sucks at it in all of the ways possible, but there is also the super inconvenient fact that most of her ideas for rebellion happen to be things that I'm all, "Sure! Whatever!" about. You want to dye your hair 14 colors? Cool. The best time to dye your hair crazy colors is when you're in high school. Want to dress in wild ways? Also cool. She just can't seem to find ways to be different from everybody else that I will object to.

BUT SHE HAS NOW!

So, remember when everybody was super excited about getting their COVID vaccine? And how they all posted photos of themselves with their vaccination cards? Like, it was definitely a thing. Instagram was wave after wave of happy people with their proof of the promise of a better tomorrow.

(Hahahahlolol ... Delta ... SOB)

Alexis saw all of those people doing a thing and became very determined to not be one of them. Way to not post that photo to Instagram, you rebel! I mean, it's such a radical act. But! It gets better! In being way too cool to be showing proof of vaccination, the kid THREW AWAY HER COVID VACCINATION CARD. I would say that this might be an example of when she didn't get all wrapped up in consequences, but nope. She considered the consequences endlessly and didn't think there would be any. In her head, people would all do the logical and smart thing and get vaccinated and this would be over and there would be no need for that silly little piece of paper.

Joke's on you, Alexis. 30% of Americans don't believe in logic.

The whole thing came up because I need to send a copy of the card to school because, you know, we've been showing proof of vaccinations since the beginning of time, but WHATEVER. Life will go on if I don't turn it in. Alexis isn't going to a Cultural Trust show without it, though. I forwarded the email about having to show proof of vaccination to go see Hamilton and suddenly Alexis realized she had dug herself a hole.

But! But! A thing happened! So, I was truly mad the kid threw away that card. When I'm truly mad, I tend to avoid a topic for a while because I will not react kindly while discussing it until I'm past that angry point. In the midst of the freeze-out about Alexis throwing away her card, she did a thing. She looked up how to get a replacement card and called the pharmacy where she was vaccinated annnnnd she made arrangements to get a replacement. By herself. As in, she dug a hole, but then she filled the hole without any parental intervention.

Keep on rebelling, kid. You seem to learn valuable life skills whenever you do.

Also, I would HATE it if you made chocolate chip cookies at some point this week. I would just drip with disapproval for such an act. Ahem.