Day Two Hundred Fifty-Eight

I don't need to tell you that I hate The Damn Elf™. I've said it before and, really, that's one thing I think all adults can unite around. The Damn Elf is full of suck.

But ... 2020. It feels like so many things have been taken from our kids, and it seems really freakin' selfish for me to take away The Damn Elf now of all times. We could all use a little extra magic this year. Mila especially needs a little magic. She's getting by in this weird world, but she's an extrovert. She definitely misses her people.

So. Magic.

I'm so bad at Elf Magic. I have forgotten to do my job every single night so far.

But, no worries! Mila is so invested in the magic, she keeps giving me ways to work around my own stupidity! I have sent her back to bed to grab a stuffed animal as I frantically grabbed the dumb thing. I never send her back to find stuffed animals. Like, never. She should have instantly been suspicious, but magic! Magic is great! There was another time that I hid the dumb thing behind my back as I walked down the stairs while holding Mila's hand and then shoved it on a table after I was all, "Oh, is the Elf over there?" and pointed in the opposite direction.

We will not be discussing the number of times that I have jumped out of bed in the middle of the night to move it. It's only been a week since the thing came out to lurk, but I am an overachiever when it comes to screwing up the Elf.

Twenty-two more days. I can't possibly screw it up all twenty-two days that are remaining. Or can I?