Genetic Vegetarianism . . . Or Not
I have gone WAAAAY out of my way to make sure the decision was Alexis'. To eat meat or not to eat meat, it's her call.
I, for one, have been a vegetarian for . . . um . . . twenty . . . TWENTY! OMFG TWENTY! years. (GET OFF MY LAWN, WHIPPERSNAPPERS.) It's not a Save the Animals Thing or Animals are Our Friends Thing or anything like that. It's more of an EWWWW! I Don't Want to Eat That! sort of thing. I just plain don't like the taste of meat. I also don't like the idea of eating something that might have been mooing and pooping and munching on heaven knows what a few weeks prior. It's kind of gross, if you think about it.
The husband, however, is an omnivore. He's on his own if he wants dead animal when we're eating at home because HELLO! I don't know how to prepare decapitated birds or bovine or swine. That usually means he eats meat maybe once per week, and usually only when we eat out.
So, really, there haven't been all that many opportunities for Alexis to chow down on some chicken or whatever. It has always been her choice, but with a slant towards it being almost, sort of, kind of impossible.
Until recently.
Recently she has become mature enough to realize that her friends at school are eating different chicken nuggets than the ones she usually has in her lunch bag (she gets Morningstar faux nuggets when we pack her lunch). She started to ask about it all, so I gave her a generic explanation. I essentially told her that there were chicken nuggets that were made out of chickens and there were some made out of plants. I like the plant ones, but she can eat whichever ones she wants.
That conversation, of course, wandered into the land of What Is Hamburger? and Where Does Bacon Come From? and all of that fun stuff. I didn't really know what she thought of the whole thing as it was pretty much a factual conversation devoid of any opinions from either of us.
Fast forward a few weeks. We were driving down the road, on our way to dance class, when a bunch of deer crossed the road in front of us. Alexis, of course, started shouting, "LOOK! DEER!" She finds the car-destroying, garden-munching monsters to be fascinating.
Mr. Husband, because he likes to torture me, was all about being obnoxious. He started saying things like, "Mmmmm . . . Tasty Deer!" and "They look delicious." Like I said, obnoxious.
Alexis was totally and completely indigant. She began to yell at Mr. Husband, lecturing him about how it wasn't nice to eat deer. She went on and on and on and on and on . . .
Fast forward again. This evening Alexis and I drove past some cows on our way home. She, of course, was all sorts of excited and started yelling, "LOOK! COWS!" She's very predictable in her observations. Truly.
Once she was done telling me what I had already seen, she went on to ask, "Hamburger is made from cows, isn't it?"
I confirmed her recollection.
She went silent.
She stayed silent for a full minute and then began to SOB. Choking on her tears, she screeched out, "It's not nice of daddy to eat cows."
I guess we know where she stands on the whole To Eat Meat or Not To Eat Meat thing.
Reader Comments (21)
you live right, honey.
Call me crazy but I wouldn't have expected a different outcome. As much as we say we want our kids to decide for ourselves, they look up to us and want to please us as much as possible. For now, she wants to be just like you, which is one of the reasons I am FOREVER grateful I quit smoking.
Now, when she's 16? All bets are off ;-)
@TwinMamaTeb--She could have just as easily decided to emulate her dad, her friends, her teachers, her grandparents . . . basically everyone else in her life. Instead, she finds it *cruel* to eat animals, which is actually a concept that I myself don't necessarily believe. She's on her own with this one, but I'm certainly not complaining.
I'll be interested to see what she does as she gets older. But for now she's rocking the star glasses and eating well no matter what so it's all good... :)
First let me say that I eat meat. I love cows, I think they're delicious. However, in my preteen (or tween, as the cool kids are calling it these days) years I met two awesome cows. I loved these cows. I even named them, Bessie (seemed like a good cow name) and Bossy (she had an ornery side to her). My parents used to store their boat at this farm that had these adorable, lovable cows. At the time, I didn't fully understand the difference between dairy cows and, well, will be dinner cows. I spent an entire summer being entertained by my new friends.
Fast forward a year. The parents stored the boat at said farm over the winter. The first time we went to get our boat I happily skipped out of the car and over to the barn. No cows. I looked around, no sign of cows. Then Mrs. Farm owner came out and handed my parents a few neatly wrapped packages. You can guess what was in them. I. Lost. It. You would've thought I was being butchered with the wailing coming out of me. It took six months before I could eat another cow. My parents, thank goodness, turned down the gift.
I, too, try and let Morgan decide to eat this or that. I don't eat meat, either. Not because I don't like it or because I'm all "Save the Animals!". I just don't. Alright, maybe it's because I just don't like it. ;) It's so easy to pass on our likes/dislikes of food to our kids and yet, Morgan? Will eat chicken nuggets or a hamburger. All the while telling me I should get over myself because they're AWESOME.
What the frack does she know? Three years ago she was still crapping in her pants ;)
I can still remember when I realized where ham comes from. I was traumatized... for a while. I got over it. Now, I eat steak maybe once a year, haven't had a hamburger in years and years, and eat ham once a year. But, I do love chicken.
She might change her mind at some point. She is a girl after all.
I am a carnivore. However, in college I had a roommate who was a vegetarian for all of her own reasons (some typical, some crazy). She had a pretty abnormal home life and one year she spent Easter break with my family. We went to visit my aunt who owns a farm and at the time had several animals - horses, cows, pigs, etc. We were there to go horseback riding but naturally we saw the other animals. They were all well-cared for and, um, named. My cousin was a little tyke at the time (about 3?) and at dinner that evening he proudly announced, "We're eating Porkchop!" We were having some sort of roast and my friend (who wasn't eating it, naturally) said, "I don't think that's a porkchop..." We had to explain that what we were eating had been NAMED Porkchop...
At first she was pretty disturbed by the idea that our food had a name but she later said, "You know, if all animals lived like this, I wouldn't be a vegetarian." I respected her honest and her choices. I always love how you let Alexis make her own.
We're not vegetarians and we still eat the Morningstar "chicken" nuggets. My poor, poor children. Though I'm sure some mean child in kindergarten is going to make fun of my kids' lunch selection and we'll have woe. Sigh.
My best friend LeighAnn is a vegetarian, and has been since she was 5 for the same reasons as you, she just doesn't like the taste of meat. Now, her own daughter (3) refuses to eat meat. She loves salad and all the healthy stuff way more than it seems most little ones her age do. I have wondered if it is nature or nurture with this one. I figured it had to do something with LeighAnn never have any meat while she was pregnant with her or something like that. I think it would be an interesting study,
@Amy--I always find it fascinating that Alexis loves healthy food. Given her choice between lima beans and chocolate, she takes lima beans. I can tell you FOR A FACT she didn't learn that from me or my husband. It was pure luck that I figured out she liked lima beans (straight out of a can, mind you--BLECH!) very early on. I don't know if that's nature or nurture or just that we got lucky (with a tinge of credit going to us for encouraging her to try healthy "grown-up" foods even before her first birthday).
I do think that fact that I didn't eat meat while pregnant plays a part, though. The one time that Alexis tried real bacon she almost instantly barfed it right back up. She is accustomed to the basic taste of bacon from eating the faux Morningstar stuff, so my guess is that it was an enzymes sort of thing.
When you step away from anything of the Morningstar or Boca variety though, what do you cook? We recently committed to become Prescatarians for 3 months. I love vegatables and seldom like meat, so I've prided myself for years on how i could easily be a vegetarian... But when I factor my family and meal plan exclusively around it, I sort of tap out at 10 meals... advice?
@Misty--I gravitate towards substituting non-meat items into any recipe I come across. I'll use Morningstar crumbles in place of ground beef, for example (chili, casseroles, etc.). We also do a lot of rice (vegetable paella is a HUGE hit at our house, as is risotto) and pasta dishes.
Yay! More bacon cheeseburghers for me!
My mom is a vegetarian for the same reason you are... just doesn't like the taste. Consequently, I never had a decent steak at home until I moved out on my own and learned how to cook one properly. Never count on the vegetarian to make good meat.
And at our house, after the "what adorable animal does X meat come from" discussion, my very omnivorous son wanted to confirm that bacon came "from delicious pigs".
Yes. Yes, it does.
Bless her heart! She is such a sweet and compassionate little girl! If she hasn't already seen it, you might want to keep her away from Bambi :)
Interesting. My daughter absolutely loves piggies - but she also loves and I do mean loves pork and deer and lamb and any other meat out there. My son he is a chicken eater mostly but will eat a good steak but only if it is bloody. You just have to love living in the USA for all of its diversity!
Good on you for letting her make up her own mind! You'll thank youself later when Alexis is ready to be her own independent person while her friends are still struggling with the concept of pleasing their parents v. doing what will make *them* happy.
Both of my kids are voracious meat eaters. I fear for my fingers were I to try to take away a steak or pork rib.
Alexis has such a sweet heart. Good for you allowing her to choose veggies over meat.
I have always loved your stance on this. Let Each Choose His Own is an awesome way to live life.
I adore that. My sister is a vegetarian and has been since she was 9 (she's 16 now). She watched some video that my mom was screening for her students and that was it. Good for you for explaining it in such kid friendly terms! Love that "some nuggets are made of chicken and some are made of plants". I totally wouldn't have been as eloquent as you. I'm totally posting this to my sister's facebook. She'll appreciate another young convert.