If It Is Blogged, The Promise Must Be Kept
If there is anywhere on this planet where teens can go to let their stupid hang out, it's Kennywood. Between the girls in high heels and tiny tops teetering around in droves and the boys falling over from the stupid that is hormones as they stare at the high heels and tiny tops, it's a giant mess of kids acting The Fool.
I've known this for years.
Alexis just figured it out this summer.
As we stood in line for a roller coaster recently, she stood open-mouthed and gaping at a gaggle of giggling girls. One had "Juicy" plastered across her barely long enough to cover her cheeks shorts. Another was wearing a top that was so low-cut she couldn't bend over without her belly button bopping her in the chin. Another was flipping the extensions in her hair around so often I thought she might take flight like a helicopter. All three of them were loud and obnoxious and generally acting like hormones had taken over their brains.
"Momma, why are they acting like that?" Alexis asked, her obvious confusion dripping from her voice.
"I don't know," I replied. Is there really an explanation that would make sense to a 6-year old? I think not.
A little later we stood in line for the pirate ship, which happens to be a ride that Alexis considers to be for little kids. She still thinks it's fun, but it's "kinda boring," in her approximation.
It's far from boring when there are twenty or so teenagers on it, though.
The flirting that was being thrown around from row-to-row of that ride included classics like the "Screaming Girl Who Needs Comforted" to the "Tough Guy Who Doesn't Flinch" to "Let's All Giggle Like Everything He Says Is The Funniest Thing Ever."
Alexis was ... confounded. I think that's the best word. She didn't understand, she was confused, and she was mortified.
"Momma," she whispered as soon as we got off of the ride. "Are all teenagers stupid?"
In our house "stupid" is considered a word we aren't supposed to use, but really, is there a better word to describe teens at Kennywood? I let the minor infraction pass.
"Yeah," I answered. "They pretty much are."
Alexis pondered the news for a few moments, her face scrunched up deep in concentration.
"Momma," she finally said, "I'm not going to be stupid when I'm a teenager. I promise."
IT'S IN WRITING, KID. YOU BETTER MAKE GOOD ON THAT PROMISE.
Monday, June 25, 2012
Reader Comments (16)
Precisely why I'm trying to keep my 7 yr old away from there until he is a stupid teenager. Very observant and perceptive child she is. You'll have to tape this to her wall when she turns 13!
Do you intend to make her read this the first thing every morning all through her teen, and probably preteen life?
Completely adorable...and so, so smart!! I hope she is able to hold onto that part of herself. The only way I am currently surviving having a teenager these days is to constantly remind myself that he's not completely responsible for all his "stupid" these days. Hormones are an evil thing.
That Alexis is one smart kid. I bet she will keep her promise too. But just in case, I would print out copies of this post and put them in various places, including a fireproof box. By the time she is 13, there probably won't be computers; we will communicate just by thinking. :-)
As the parent of a teenage girl, um .... good luck making her keep that promise!
Video. You need video proof. When she's a teen, she'll think you MADE IT UP I NEVER SAID THAT!
So observant, little girl! Wonderfully observant. If only we all could have made that promise and kept it!
YES! Explain how you made a child so awesome... please?
She is smart enough that she might keep her promise.
Hahaha! This is awesome! I love it. ;D
I too was at Kennywood yesterday (I recognized you and Alexis by the Kangaroo!) and I witnessed this horrifying display as well. My husband had twitches all day as he flashed forward and imagined our two daughters (5 and 2) as teenagers! UGH!
I would print out a contract and make her SIGN it! Blake promised he would always live with me when he was little and I said can I get that in writing and he said I didn't needed it.... now he is 20 and say because I didn't get it in writing it's a no go. Good thing he still going to college because he still comes home on holidays.
Ugh. Teenagers. I wish we could ship them off to an island and not let them come back to society until they have it under control again!
As the parent of 2 formerly amazing, smart, mature, well out together children I can assure you, they all turn stupid. Awful, eye rolling , sarcasm laden, sigh heaving, stoopid. The good news is that at 20 one of them has back around to the awesome side. Only 7 more stoopid years to go...
Yes, Yes they are. {sigh}
I can only hope <3
i love the idea of having her write something and sign it, because sadly she will become a teenager ravaged with hormones. incredible what we all have to go through. thankfully you are putting one incredible framework in place for her. i have no doubt that she will come out even more magnificent of a person. but i really can't think of her as a teenager. i struggle with her being six already!