It's Best To Handle These Matters Yourself, Mila

I think it's safe to say that Mila does not understand this whole Santa thing. I keep telling her to ask Santa each and every time she tells me I should buy her something and she keeps replying, "I already did." She's totally serious. She swears that she's had a lengthy conversation with Santa and he has already approved all of her requests.

It's super convenient when you view the world the way Mila does.

Alas, I'm not all in on this "Santa said I could have it" thing, so I keep threatening to rat her out if she does something she shouldn't. I threatened her no less than 400 times just in the three block walk from our car to the Santa at Market Square, even. Mila knew where we were going and yet she thought it would be fun to press her luck.

Rumor has it that there are babies, a bike, and a "fairy teddy bear" on the line.

I don't know that because she told me, by the way. I know that because as we were walking to visit Santa, Mila was talking to herself and planning her "GIMME ALL THE STUFF!" speech. I sort of put her up to it by telling her to think about what she was going to ask for, but then it turned out she can't think things quietly in her head.

I should have known that.

So the whole way to Santa, she planned. She rehearsed. She knew exactly what she was going to say when we walked up to the jolly old man.

I bet you know what happened.

Once standing next to the jolly old man, she froze. She suddenly, for the first time ... ever, had no words. She stared at him blankly and had absolutely nothing to say. After a long minute of stage fright, she turned to Alexis and asked for help. Alexis being the super awesome sister that she is took the approximate list that Mila had recited several times and turned it into something much better.

"She wants toys."

GOOD JOB, ALEXIS.

Mila's reaction was the best part of the day. She looked at her spokesperson and glared, clearly firing her from all of the things ever. "That's not my list!" she hissed.

"Oh, and she wants dance stuff and a Forever XXI gift card."

I guess now we know why Mila thought she should rehearse her lines. She must have known that her sister would swoop in and steal her Christmas wishes.